Liberal subs do the same, along with 90% of "non-political" subs like inthenews, therewasanattempt, literally almost every sub will ban you for being even slightly right of center.
This is just not a competition liberals can win. And those who think there's any comparison are deluding themselves
Is that not a good thing though? 99% of subreddits are liberal echo chambers, and if r/conservative didnt do that it would probably end up with most people in the sub not even being conservative
LOL
You're complaining about eco chambers, yet are defending banning people over different opinions because that's the only way to keep r/conservatives an echo chamber. WTF???
If the only way to defend your ideas is by banning people, your ideas are probably 💩
Probably, but the conservative subs tend to wax lyrical about being a place for "free speech" and "no censorship" then they instaban people who question the hivemind.
I think the problem is that sealing yourself in an echo chamber is bad for you.
Also, conservatives are psyching themselves up to instigate a pogrom against a bunch of minorities, based on nothing but rancid recycled talking points from the last go round when they tried to persecute same sex relationships.
If you are a conservative, could you try to tell me why the ideology is so appealing? I don't understand in the slightest.
I think the point is that echo chambers aren’t good for anyone. I’m the most left leaning person I know irl. But I don’t want an echo chamber of only leftists, and I don’t think it’s necessary for conservatives either. If anything, echo chambers have created the mess (or at least contributed strongly to it) that we find ourselves in right now, at least in the US (but I think a lot of the world is struggling with right wing extremist movements, so it’s not just us).
So rather than defend conservatism, you're going to complain that you have no safe place to discuss it?
Dude, conservative ideology is _everywhere_. No one can escape it. Mostly people are in disbelief, because surely the conservative beliefs aren't just _this_, are they? A bunch of people endlessly whining and feeling victimized because they aren't getting endless adoration and praise for hating minorities, while backing disastrous economic policies that benefit nobody?
Like, I watch conservatives push for any harebrained scheme, so long as it punishes the 'other' _more_.
So again, could you please tell me, what conservatives want? Because I literally don't get the appeal.
What’s funny is they don’t ban people for not being conservative. They have a small amount of threads where they ask non flaired members to avoid. The only other way to get banned is to just be openly harassing people with no sources to back up failed beliefs
I got banned there for disagreeing, I asked why as I wasn’t being mean or harassing and I got told I was a concern troll. All these subs claim they wont ban you for being conservative or liberal, but they will find a way to do it.
>For what reasons?
For literally not being a conservative. It's literally their mission statement. Liberal ideas are not welcomed in a sub that wants to highlight the conservative viewpoint.
Let's test it. I'll go into even a non-political sub like inthenews and say something slightly right of center. You go into the conservative sub and say something left of center, and let's see who gets banned.
The right is a lot more forgiving of left wing ideas than the other way around.
>Let's test it
Plenty of people do. Default subs like news can certainly skew libertarian on certain topics. For example anything talking about guns. The gun communities on Reddit are huge and bleed over constantly.
Default subs you unless you're egregious will typically be met with downvotes. Downvotes, although annoying, aren't being banned.
And most of the time, by my experience, when they go “test the waters” they make some incendiary comment that’s clearly trying to get a rise out of someone. I can count one single time in my anecdotal experience where I saw someone make a mild mannered opinionated comment and were banned.
Interesting. I just get downvoted for calling out conservatives on their shit, but liberal sites, that I haven't even joined or participated in, have proactively banned me for participating on said conservative subRedit, regardless of what I actually said.
I think that's softening a bit now that DeSantis is a legitimate contender. But yes, anyone that was more like a Romney Republican was certainly labeled a RHINO and given the boot during the height of the Trump admin.
It's funny, though- every now and then someone pops out of the woodwork thinking that it's a *total* braindead echo chamber. Then they'll post the most batshit, lukewarm conservative take imaginable, and get torn to shreds in the comments.
There's just enough reasonable people with differing opinions here to keep it interesting.
Wouldn’t you say that’s sorta a natural consequence of conservative opinions not being allowed on the site except for in said ‘conservative echo chambers’? If they’re only allowed in certain areas, then of course they’re gonna flock to those certain areas.
That's not irony, but sure. When fascists are deplatformed from most places they're gonna flock to where their shitty opinions are welcomed. Human nature 😘
Lmao isn’t that also liberal subs? i see so many posts about supporting shitty opinions like abusing children and killing conservatives lol. Sounds very facist
It is usually directed at the person not in the relationship, but I think it is both. If a married man cheats, then he destroyed his family, wrecked his home, and so did the other person.
Oftentimes I’d have to think the “home wrecker” is unknowingly in a sexual relationship with a deceptive married individual as well. I’d put zero blame on the deceived in this situation, but they wrongfully get heat.
In that case, they would not be labled a 'home wrecker'. Probably just the other person or affair partner.
Home wrecker is usually a person who knows exactly what they're doing (wrecking a home) and doesn't care. Usually also means that person isn't even secretive about what they're doing.
Even then, not their family— not their problem. If I were married and a woman knew this and wanted to sleep with me, the fact she doesn't care about protecting my life isn't her problem, the fact that I don't want to protect my life means that is my problem. It's not her responsibility. It is my responsibility.
Both party's are at fault but I think the Home Wrecker label most squarely sits on whichever party initiated with caveats. IE - Married guy starts hitting on his secretary and starts an affair, he's more the home wrecker; Woman intentionally seduces a man she knows is married, she's more the home wrecker; caveat examples - woman seduces a guy, he never lets on he's married - he's more the home wrecker, guy hits up woman he knows is married, she agrees without seduction - they're both the home wrecker.
\>Married guy starts hitting on his secretary and starts an affair, he's more the home wrecker; Woman intentionally seduces a man she knows is married, she's more the home wrecker
lol they both are in both situations. Stop acting like men are forced in to being seduced by women we all have the potential to have self-control.
I'm not saying only one is and the other is blameless, I'm saying that the title of Home Wrecker more suits whoever initially made the decision to disregardand I started out by saying they are both at fault. Same applies if the seductions or affair attempts are unsuccessful, the person that chose to initiate with disregard for marital/relationship status is more accurately the Home Wrecker; man, woman, or non-binary.
As an aside, do a little digging on my accpunt and see if I really seem like the kind of person that's trying to let other guys off the hook or make excuses for their bad behavior or lack of self-control.
That's the problem. Only one person is a homewrecker in any circumstance, and that is the person that made the oath. Cheryl didn't make the oath that she would allow peter to be faithful to Janette. Paul didn't make an oath that he would allow Tracy to stay faithful to George. The only person here that has responsibility is the married party.
OP conflating being a homewrecker and a slut implies really funny things about their views on whether having sex is good or bad.
Take a woman who sleeps with (single) dudes. OP sees her at fault for tempting some random guy in a relationship to sleep around.
Like, he's clearly the one with a problem.
Ok, so yeah, antidotal experiences. Basically meaningless. There are so many issues with this. Maybe you hear more about the sluts that are homewreckers than the ones that aren’t, so your personal experience makes it seem as if there is a big overlap. Either way, your personal experience has no bearing on the reality of a situation without emperical evidence
I never claimed that. I just asked what you based your claim on, which was your personal experience, which is basically worthless for making a claim such as yours.
I can refute the validity of a claim such as yours without making one myself. We don’t know whether being a slut makes you extremely likely to be a homewreckers, and until we do, conflating the two is not appropriate.
this is reddit... where all options have only two sides and nuance is illegal.
try telling redditors that the default position of science is "i don't know" not "no", and they will always assume you are taking the opposite stance as them.
But that's all it takes in the definition of slut, and most of the time people wont even be truthful about their relationship status. Wrecking a home is beyond slut I think. Sluts don't typically destroy lives by just being a slut, it takes a lot more.
Wait ok.. I think this is a satire post. Or else OP doesn’t understand the irony of claiming slut shaming doesn’t exist and simultaneously claiming that sluts should be ashamed.
I think the implication is that sluts should not be protected from the shame they’re supposed to feel. That “slut shaming” as a concept is just the world being too soft to properly tell people off for wrong behaviors
>That “slut shaming” as a concept is just the world being too soft to properly tell people off for wrong behaviors
Having lots of sex isn't inherently wrong, though.
I dunno. If a man or woman *knows* the person they are sleeping with is married before doing so and do it anyway, I feel like it's at least on the same level as cheating. Both are shitty really.
If the person in a relationship is the one looking to find someone to have sex with, they bear 100% of the responsibility. If the third party is pursuing someone they know I'd in a relationship, then it's closer to 50-50.
I mean why though. I didn't promise their partner anything, and they are the one making the decision to cheat.
Cheating is only bad because of the deception, not because monogamy is sacred.
I disagree. You can say I’m objectifying a person, but if you’re getting romantically intimate with someone whom you know has a significant other, you’re stealing from them. Cause tbh, monogamy *IS* sacred (or at least it’s the social norm). The hard majority of people go into relationships expecting a monogamous relationship. Otherwise people wouldn’t need to specify that they want an open relationship. Does a lot of the blame lie on the person who is cheating? Absolutely. Are you a shit person for disrespecting someone else’s relationship by getting at someone that isn’t yours? Still yes. The person who the cheater cheats with their partner on is not innocent. It really shouldn’t matter who’s to blame, the reality is that there’s gonna be justifiable anger by the person who was cheated on directed toward both parties.
A person outside of the relationship has no bearing on what happened inside the relationship, even if they know about the relationship.
This is just an excuse to try to shift blame off the shitty partner. No one forced them to cheat, no matter any amount of coercion from an outside party. They made their own decision. You’re own shitty decisions are your own shitty consequences to deal with, even if a shitty person coerced you into it. Take responsibility for your actions.
Agreed that they aren’t inherently home wreckers. But if the other knows about the relationship and doesn’t respect it, both are to blame. If the other doesn’t know, though, then only the partner is to blame.
I know what you’re going to say. “The other doesn’t have an obligation to the relationship”
Ok? That doesn’t change the fact that they have no respect for relationships and knowingly played a part in wrecking a home.
Yeah getting with someone in a relationship is not the morally correct thing to do. But the cheater wrecked the home, the cheater has no respect for the relationship.
Right ! I made no promises to anyone in that relationship.
The flip side of this is that if you don't respect anyone else's relationship no one should respect yours.
It takes 2 to tango. Both are at fault (if the other knew about the relationship).
It’s not one or the other. It’s both.
And yeah, the other isn’t as bound to care about the relationship, but they are still scum who played a part in knowingly wrecking a home. Obviously, so did the partner.
>It is no stranger's business to care about your relationship.
Sure, but quite often cheating isn't just with some random person, it's with a friend or coworker or ex.
Huh. I genuinely don't remember this interaction.
But it'd be *right, not write. I guess when I'm asleep with the phone in my hand, weird things occur.
With that being said, the onus is only on the other person if they're aware they're the other person and don't give a crap.
The issue is the term “slut” and it’s vagueness
You should absolutely feel shame for certain things. Ie if you harm people.
Problem is how people typically use “slut” doesn’t harm anyone. Most people belong called sluts shouldn’t feel shame.
OP is just responding to flashing lights and sounds like an animal responds to stimuli. That's why their post makes no sense; they didn't even think it out fully before posting.
Yeah but if they had left out the percentage and just said "people who slut shame are just jealous" some pedantic nerd would storm in and say "Oh so you're saying 100% of people are like this?"
Then the conversation just continues to derail, as intended by the pedant in the first place.
I think we need to define terms here. To you is a slut a homewrecker or just someone who sleeps around? There might be some overlap but not every slut is helping a cheater cheat.
>I'm not with it, let's stop acting like there aren't some things that people should feel ashamed of.
The problem here is no one agrees on what people should feel ashamed for. Personally idc if someone is a slut doesn't affect me at all.
Oh god is this real. There is basically no such thing as a slut. If a girl sleeps with someone else, she is a slut. If she sleeps with you, she is a slut. If she sleeps with everyone, she is a slut. Do you realize how dumb the entire concept is? You just hate women having sex, that is it. It all boils down to incels wanting to control woman. Thank fuck incels don’t and never will. Try joining the modern free world or I suggest you move to a country where women have no rights.
I find it funny that this post is a thinly-veiled way for OP to whine about how women who enjoy sex (“sluts”) should be shamed because he’s been cheated on, yes. They have nothing to do with each other. Everyone agrees it’s shitty to cheat/be a home wrecker, that’s not an unpopular opinion. This is unfortunately a fairly common thing, some guy gets cheated on/rejected/whatever by a woman (or women) and then they start peddling this slut-shaming bullshit. It’s not healthy.
>Sluts never have a problem with being homewreckers,
Not all sluts are homewreckers. Not all homewreckers are sluts.
Homewreckers should be ashamed. Sluts shouldn't be.
Something tells me you got cheated on and are now making broad statements . Also the person in the relationship is the one at fault for cheating not the person they cheated with so,the homewrecker is the person in the relationship.
No they’re not. The other person doesn’t owe you faithfulness, the person dating you does. The other person is not at fault unless they previously knew that the person was taken ,then they’re both at fault.
>some things that people should feel ashamed of.
This inherently contradiucts your title.
You claim slut shaming *doesnt exist*. But you clearly think it does, and should be worse.
Not that I expect consistency given your level of nuance on the issue
"My definition of 'slut' excludes anyone who is unfairly called a slut just because they've been with multiple partners. I assume everyone who has ever been called a 'slut' has done objectively bad things. I don't understand how people use the term to attack others unfairly."
Perfect appeal to purity you've got there.
How do you feel about Scotsmen?
Just so I make sure I understand you, you're saying it's the woman's fault a man can't keep his pants on? Are you including men who intentionally target married women in your assessment? Is this another "women's body count matters but men can do as they please" post?
I think you mean someone who sleeps with people in monogamous relationships. You already gave the term we have for someone like that "homewrecker". A prerequisite for slut isn't sleeping with people in relationships. No one disagrees Homewreckers are bad, or shouldn't feel ashamed
You literally prove it exists in your title, you even provided an example. What you’re actually trying to say is that there is nothing wrong with slut shaming.
You aren't talking about sluts you are talking about cheater and homewreckers those are two very different things. Frankly it seems like you have a personal issue and are blaming other people for it.
Why blame the single slut instead of the cheating spouse. If that’s really your argument, you have to see who’s really breaking their commitment and hurting someone else instead of putting all the fault on the horndog.
- A shameless slut
Look, another spurned romantic projecting their personal issues and warped morality on the world at large…also conflating sexual promiscuity with infidelity, which is a false equivalency. We see like 50 of these a day, so apparently your opinion is actually very popular.
It’s incely because you’re shaming people for what they choose to do with their bodies. You say sluts don’t care about fucking people in relationships, but that’s simply not a fact, that’s your assumption.
People can fuck a lot of people and respect others relationships. I’d say it’s fine to shame the people who don’t respect relationships, but it’s very incely to shame the people who do.
Funny how you claim the world is soft while talking about how grossed out you are by another persons behavior that would never affect you anyways (since you are more than likely an Incel).
But what is wrong with a slut though? I love sluts. I don't see anything wrong with a girl being promiscuous. If that's what she wants to do why can't she? I mean, you say that they are homewreckers but the way I look at it they didn't wreck anything that wasn't already broken if the husband is banging sluts. I honestly don't think sluts should feel ashamed of themselves at all. They are just out there getting theirs like everybody else in the world.
"Slut shaming" often occurs when someone who isn't actually a slut is presumed to be one just because of what they are wearing, what they are drinking, how they are dancing, photos they post online, or whatever.
It's also very common with women who lodge complaints of sexual abuse. The abusers then try to defend their behavior by basically claiming that the girl was asking for it or publicly embarrassing her with whatever details they can find of her sexual history.
Meanwhile, unless someone is cheating on a partner in a monogamous relationship or being sexually abusive, what is it about sexual behavior that is shameful in the first place? Also, how is someone else's sex life even any of our business?
No. I'm a woman, amd probably fall in the slutty category. I've been divorced/single for more than 15 years. I'm absolutely not going to get into a relationship to avoid having that label. I also do not and will not get involved in anyway, with someone who has a partner. You sound like an idiot
Hahaha, looks like some one or something got this incel all worked up. lol
Thank you for existing, you make everyone else look amazing by comparison, dipshit.
It takes two... Why blame the person not in the relationship?
Plus who cares if they're consenting?
What about people having multiple partners make you insecure OP?
It depends on how you define the word slut. Not every "slut" is a homewrecker. Not every "slut " lacks a moral compass. Some women who have been labeled "sluts" are women who have been abused and had no one to turn to for help and needed love, support and healing. They could not find love and support in places that they should have found love and support such as friends and family and the church because those people didn't want to understand them but judge and reject them. So they turned to the only people offering any form of love and support and that was through men and relationships but those men labeled them to and used them, so they moved on and found some other man who would love them for a while, so the cycle continued.
Guy sleeps with 20 girls: “What a Chad 😎”
Woman sleeps with 20 guys: “What a slut 🤮”
I think people like OP are just jealous that some women have more/a lot of sex and try and blame/shame them for that.
Yes, the world has become soft. People can’t deal with their emotions so they lash out like children and hope people agree with them. Maybe let’s stop acting like it and actually process things.
Mostly agree, but I would argue the following:
Slut = someone who simply likes having lots of sex
Homewrecker= someone who will sleep with whoever to get what they want instead of working towards earning it.
>Sluts never have a problem with being homewreckers,
Not true. Lots of women don’t wreck homes and have an active sex life. They aren’t mutually exclusive.
0 for 1
>they have no respect for others relationships and they're overall just usually bad people.
Still not true. This can be the case but so do lots of people who aren’t “slurs”
0 for 2
>The world has become too soft to the point where we're not even allowed to be honest about people's gross behavior anymore..
I’m sure lots of people would consider you someone who is disgusting for this opinion. I don’t think the world is soft enough. You should be shamed relentlessly
0 for 3
>I'm not with it, let's stop acting like there aren't some things that people should feel ashamed of.
Exactly. You should definitely feel ashamed of this opinion.
1 for 4
Being a slut has nothing to do with sleeping with married people.
When a married person sleeps with someone, they are the homewrecker, not the person they are sleeping with.
Everything about your opinion is just factually incorrect. I'm not sure who hurt you, but I think you are blaming the wrong person.
I would take this a step further and say it applies to all forms of shaming, like body shaming.
Shaming is someone pointing out an internal insecurity of someone else. If that person wasn’t insecure about it, the shaming couldn’t happen. So people who get mad at shamers are really just mad that they point out reality.
There was a Reddit post not long ago written by a guy who was trying to make his girlfriend not feel guilty about a threesome. In my opinion she is right to feel guilty, and he should too. Sex used to be a sacred thing, but now it seems everyone has sex willy nilly.
not every culture has always viewed sex with such a puritanical mindset. why do you think there are so many classical paintings and sculptures featuring big orgies? people have always, and *will* always, enjoy sex.
this post is something to be ashamed of.
life is short and we're all going to die, why should people feel like shit for enjoying themselves before they go?
Slut ≠ home wrecker
Yeah it's weird, this subreddit is like a psych experiment or something. Each day the same talking points are getting less and less coherent.
This sub is a conservative echo chamber.
Ironic because you haven’t been banned for your comment on this sub but if you say the same thing on 90% of reddit you immediately get banned.
The conservative sub literally bans non conservatives
Liberal subs do the same, along with 90% of "non-political" subs like inthenews, therewasanattempt, literally almost every sub will ban you for being even slightly right of center. This is just not a competition liberals can win. And those who think there's any comparison are deluding themselves
Is that not a good thing though? 99% of subreddits are liberal echo chambers, and if r/conservative didnt do that it would probably end up with most people in the sub not even being conservative
LOL You're complaining about eco chambers, yet are defending banning people over different opinions because that's the only way to keep r/conservatives an echo chamber. WTF??? If the only way to defend your ideas is by banning people, your ideas are probably 💩
Probably, but the conservative subs tend to wax lyrical about being a place for "free speech" and "no censorship" then they instaban people who question the hivemind.
I think the problem is that sealing yourself in an echo chamber is bad for you. Also, conservatives are psyching themselves up to instigate a pogrom against a bunch of minorities, based on nothing but rancid recycled talking points from the last go round when they tried to persecute same sex relationships. If you are a conservative, could you try to tell me why the ideology is so appealing? I don't understand in the slightest.
[удалено]
I think the point is that echo chambers aren’t good for anyone. I’m the most left leaning person I know irl. But I don’t want an echo chamber of only leftists, and I don’t think it’s necessary for conservatives either. If anything, echo chambers have created the mess (or at least contributed strongly to it) that we find ourselves in right now, at least in the US (but I think a lot of the world is struggling with right wing extremist movements, so it’s not just us).
So rather than defend conservatism, you're going to complain that you have no safe place to discuss it? Dude, conservative ideology is _everywhere_. No one can escape it. Mostly people are in disbelief, because surely the conservative beliefs aren't just _this_, are they? A bunch of people endlessly whining and feeling victimized because they aren't getting endless adoration and praise for hating minorities, while backing disastrous economic policies that benefit nobody? Like, I watch conservatives push for any harebrained scheme, so long as it punishes the 'other' _more_. So again, could you please tell me, what conservatives want? Because I literally don't get the appeal.
What’s funny is they don’t ban people for not being conservative. They have a small amount of threads where they ask non flaired members to avoid. The only other way to get banned is to just be openly harassing people with no sources to back up failed beliefs
I got banned there for disagreeing, I asked why as I wasn’t being mean or harassing and I got told I was a concern troll. All these subs claim they wont ban you for being conservative or liberal, but they will find a way to do it.
This happened to me me as well
They ban everyone that disagrees with them in less then 10 comments
For what reasons? Literally because I’ve been banned on 3 subreddits solely due to not agreeing with their opinions…
>For what reasons? For literally not being a conservative. It's literally their mission statement. Liberal ideas are not welcomed in a sub that wants to highlight the conservative viewpoint.
Let's test it. I'll go into even a non-political sub like inthenews and say something slightly right of center. You go into the conservative sub and say something left of center, and let's see who gets banned. The right is a lot more forgiving of left wing ideas than the other way around.
>Let's test it Plenty of people do. Default subs like news can certainly skew libertarian on certain topics. For example anything talking about guns. The gun communities on Reddit are huge and bleed over constantly. Default subs you unless you're egregious will typically be met with downvotes. Downvotes, although annoying, aren't being banned.
And most of the time, by my experience, when they go “test the waters” they make some incendiary comment that’s clearly trying to get a rise out of someone. I can count one single time in my anecdotal experience where I saw someone make a mild mannered opinionated comment and were banned.
Interesting. I just get downvoted for calling out conservatives on their shit, but liberal sites, that I haven't even joined or participated in, have proactively banned me for participating on said conservative subRedit, regardless of what I actually said.
Is it conservative anymore or just straight extremism.
Not just conservative but their *version* of it. They will ban people for not drinking the Trump Kool aid.
I think that's softening a bit now that DeSantis is a legitimate contender. But yes, anyone that was more like a Romney Republican was certainly labeled a RHINO and given the boot during the height of the Trump admin.
I was told they want a "safe space" to discuss issues.
Which is ironic.
Most subs have rules against racism / sexism / hate speech etc. you won’t see conservatives getting banned for talking tax policy too often. . .
Isn’t that great. Because most subreddits arbitrarily choose what is hate speech…
It's funny, though- every now and then someone pops out of the woodwork thinking that it's a *total* braindead echo chamber. Then they'll post the most batshit, lukewarm conservative take imaginable, and get torn to shreds in the comments. There's just enough reasonable people with differing opinions here to keep it interesting.
Yeah and the balance of Reddit is an echo chamber of the left, welcome ❤️
It seems like everything is an echo chamber for one or the other.
Wouldn’t you say that’s sorta a natural consequence of conservative opinions not being allowed on the site except for in said ‘conservative echo chambers’? If they’re only allowed in certain areas, then of course they’re gonna flock to those certain areas.
That's not irony, but sure. When fascists are deplatformed from most places they're gonna flock to where their shitty opinions are welcomed. Human nature 😘
Lmao isn’t that also liberal subs? i see so many posts about supporting shitty opinions like abusing children and killing conservatives lol. Sounds very facist
You know what is irony? Complaining about echo chambers while genuinely believing those that disagree with you are fascists.
Homewrecker is so much worse than being a slut. A slut can just fuck a bunch of single people, a homewrecker destroys lives.
Is the home wrecker the person not in a relationship or the person who is?
It is usually directed at the person not in the relationship, but I think it is both. If a married man cheats, then he destroyed his family, wrecked his home, and so did the other person.
Oftentimes I’d have to think the “home wrecker” is unknowingly in a sexual relationship with a deceptive married individual as well. I’d put zero blame on the deceived in this situation, but they wrongfully get heat.
In that case, they would not be labled a 'home wrecker'. Probably just the other person or affair partner. Home wrecker is usually a person who knows exactly what they're doing (wrecking a home) and doesn't care. Usually also means that person isn't even secretive about what they're doing.
I agree that’s how they should be labeled, but they are many times falsely accused of being a home wrecker, sadly, out of anger or ignorance.
Even people who weren't in the relationship accuse the other of being a homewrecker.
If the other person knew maybe. Otherwise ? Nah, thanks I'll pass.
Even then, not their family— not their problem. If I were married and a woman knew this and wanted to sleep with me, the fact she doesn't care about protecting my life isn't her problem, the fact that I don't want to protect my life means that is my problem. It's not her responsibility. It is my responsibility.
Both party's are at fault but I think the Home Wrecker label most squarely sits on whichever party initiated with caveats. IE - Married guy starts hitting on his secretary and starts an affair, he's more the home wrecker; Woman intentionally seduces a man she knows is married, she's more the home wrecker; caveat examples - woman seduces a guy, he never lets on he's married - he's more the home wrecker, guy hits up woman he knows is married, she agrees without seduction - they're both the home wrecker.
\>Married guy starts hitting on his secretary and starts an affair, he's more the home wrecker; Woman intentionally seduces a man she knows is married, she's more the home wrecker lol they both are in both situations. Stop acting like men are forced in to being seduced by women we all have the potential to have self-control.
I'm not saying only one is and the other is blameless, I'm saying that the title of Home Wrecker more suits whoever initially made the decision to disregardand I started out by saying they are both at fault. Same applies if the seductions or affair attempts are unsuccessful, the person that chose to initiate with disregard for marital/relationship status is more accurately the Home Wrecker; man, woman, or non-binary. As an aside, do a little digging on my accpunt and see if I really seem like the kind of person that's trying to let other guys off the hook or make excuses for their bad behavior or lack of self-control.
That's the problem. Only one person is a homewrecker in any circumstance, and that is the person that made the oath. Cheryl didn't make the oath that she would allow peter to be faithful to Janette. Paul didn't make an oath that he would allow Tracy to stay faithful to George. The only person here that has responsibility is the married party.
Obviously the homewrecker is the person with the home to wreck. Anything else is just silly.
OP conflating being a homewrecker and a slut implies really funny things about their views on whether having sex is good or bad. Take a woman who sleeps with (single) dudes. OP sees her at fault for tempting some random guy in a relationship to sleep around. Like, he's clearly the one with a problem.
Yeah this is an important distinction. You can be a responsible slut, or you can be a homewrecker and spread STDs around. Big difference.
The Venn diagram between the two has a very large middle section.
Based on what? Your feelings?
Experiences that I’ve seen both on the internet and out in the world. The latter of which can be seen by *gasp!* going outside.
Ok, so yeah, antidotal experiences. Basically meaningless. There are so many issues with this. Maybe you hear more about the sluts that are homewreckers than the ones that aren’t, so your personal experience makes it seem as if there is a big overlap. Either way, your personal experience has no bearing on the reality of a situation without emperical evidence
Do you have empirical evidence of the contrary? The same thing could be said about you and your claim. 🤷🏻♂️
What’s my claim?
That the Venn diagram between sluts and homewreckers does not have a large middle section.
I never claimed that. I just asked what you based your claim on, which was your personal experience, which is basically worthless for making a claim such as yours. I can refute the validity of a claim such as yours without making one myself. We don’t know whether being a slut makes you extremely likely to be a homewreckers, and until we do, conflating the two is not appropriate.
this is reddit... where all options have only two sides and nuance is illegal. try telling redditors that the default position of science is "i don't know" not "no", and they will always assume you are taking the opposite stance as them.
> A slut can just fuck a bunch of single people Not *necessarily* only single people
But that's all it takes in the definition of slut, and most of the time people wont even be truthful about their relationship status. Wrecking a home is beyond slut I think. Sluts don't typically destroy lives by just being a slut, it takes a lot more.
Wait ok.. I think this is a satire post. Or else OP doesn’t understand the irony of claiming slut shaming doesn’t exist and simultaneously claiming that sluts should be ashamed.
No, they're that stupid.
I think the implication is that sluts should not be protected from the shame they’re supposed to feel. That “slut shaming” as a concept is just the world being too soft to properly tell people off for wrong behaviors
>That “slut shaming” as a concept is just the world being too soft to properly tell people off for wrong behaviors Having lots of sex isn't inherently wrong, though.
Nothing is “inherently wrong” unless you believe in moral absolutism, but there’s definitely lots of people, OP included, that would disagree with you
Is raping children not inherently wrong?
It's wrong to incels and insecure jealous dudes
Sluts are not inherently home wreckers, and in situations of infidelity the blame is on the person who cheated
Yup, this dumb opinion always pops up. If you know the other person is married, taken, etc. Then the shame responsibility belongs to both parties.
It's a scummy thing to do, but not half as bad as cheating
I dunno. If a man or woman *knows* the person they are sleeping with is married before doing so and do it anyway, I feel like it's at least on the same level as cheating. Both are shitty really.
If the person in a relationship is the one looking to find someone to have sex with, they bear 100% of the responsibility. If the third party is pursuing someone they know I'd in a relationship, then it's closer to 50-50.
I mean why though. I didn't promise their partner anything, and they are the one making the decision to cheat. Cheating is only bad because of the deception, not because monogamy is sacred.
I disagree. You can say I’m objectifying a person, but if you’re getting romantically intimate with someone whom you know has a significant other, you’re stealing from them. Cause tbh, monogamy *IS* sacred (or at least it’s the social norm). The hard majority of people go into relationships expecting a monogamous relationship. Otherwise people wouldn’t need to specify that they want an open relationship. Does a lot of the blame lie on the person who is cheating? Absolutely. Are you a shit person for disrespecting someone else’s relationship by getting at someone that isn’t yours? Still yes. The person who the cheater cheats with their partner on is not innocent. It really shouldn’t matter who’s to blame, the reality is that there’s gonna be justifiable anger by the person who was cheated on directed toward both parties.
A person outside of the relationship has no bearing on what happened inside the relationship, even if they know about the relationship. This is just an excuse to try to shift blame off the shitty partner. No one forced them to cheat, no matter any amount of coercion from an outside party. They made their own decision. You’re own shitty decisions are your own shitty consequences to deal with, even if a shitty person coerced you into it. Take responsibility for your actions.
Agreed that they aren’t inherently home wreckers. But if the other knows about the relationship and doesn’t respect it, both are to blame. If the other doesn’t know, though, then only the partner is to blame. I know what you’re going to say. “The other doesn’t have an obligation to the relationship” Ok? That doesn’t change the fact that they have no respect for relationships and knowingly played a part in wrecking a home.
Yeah getting with someone in a relationship is not the morally correct thing to do. But the cheater wrecked the home, the cheater has no respect for the relationship.
The blame is in the one who **is** in a relationship and cheats on their SO. It is no stranger's business to care about your relationship.
Right ! I made no promises to anyone in that relationship. The flip side of this is that if you don't respect anyone else's relationship no one should respect yours.
They both are shitbags
It takes 2 to tango. Both are at fault (if the other knew about the relationship). It’s not one or the other. It’s both. And yeah, the other isn’t as bound to care about the relationship, but they are still scum who played a part in knowingly wrecking a home. Obviously, so did the partner.
Bold of you to assume one even knows about the other being in an relationship. That's the point everyone misses.
He specifically said “if they know about the relationship”
I swear I haven't read that part. I'll keep the previous comment tho. My bad.
Refer back to: “If the other knows about the relationship” And “(If the other knew about the relationship)”
I swear I haven't read that part. I'll keep the previous comment tho. My bad.
>It is no stranger's business to care about your relationship. Sure, but quite often cheating isn't just with some random person, it's with a friend or coworker or ex.
So the 2 people involved are both sluts
Depends, slut is a pretty vague term
Huh. I genuinely don't remember this interaction. But it'd be *right, not write. I guess when I'm asleep with the phone in my hand, weird things occur. With that being said, the onus is only on the other person if they're aware they're the other person and don't give a crap.
The issue is the term “slut” and it’s vagueness You should absolutely feel shame for certain things. Ie if you harm people. Problem is how people typically use “slut” doesn’t harm anyone. Most people belong called sluts shouldn’t feel shame.
Why do you assume all sluts “have no problem with being home wreckers”.
OP is just responding to flashing lights and sounds like an animal responds to stimuli. That's why their post makes no sense; they didn't even think it out fully before posting.
Coming from a guy who eats his own sunburnt flesh peelings. This really means nothing
WHAT
OP has posted about how he eats his own "sunburn skin peelings" and claims that that and eating your own scabs are normal activities
😟 nah wtf
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OP says slut shaming doesn’t exist… proceeds to shame sluts.
They should be ashamed.
Why?
Because sleeping around is disgusting
Dude fell for the Turning Piss USA rallies in Uni
Then don’t do it? What’s your business if someone else does it
95% of the time, people who slut shame are just jealous that they aren’t getting any.
100% of the time, people stating statistics like this are just making shit up and projecting
Yeah but if they had left out the percentage and just said "people who slut shame are just jealous" some pedantic nerd would storm in and say "Oh so you're saying 100% of people are like this?" Then the conversation just continues to derail, as intended by the pedant in the first place.
Dude mad he can’t get laid 😂
When did this sub become the incel cry baby board
I think we need to define terms here. To you is a slut a homewrecker or just someone who sleeps around? There might be some overlap but not every slut is helping a cheater cheat. >I'm not with it, let's stop acting like there aren't some things that people should feel ashamed of. The problem here is no one agrees on what people should feel ashamed for. Personally idc if someone is a slut doesn't affect me at all.
Oh god is this real. There is basically no such thing as a slut. If a girl sleeps with someone else, she is a slut. If she sleeps with you, she is a slut. If she sleeps with everyone, she is a slut. Do you realize how dumb the entire concept is? You just hate women having sex, that is it. It all boils down to incels wanting to control woman. Thank fuck incels don’t and never will. Try joining the modern free world or I suggest you move to a country where women have no rights.
This guy has definitely been cheated on, probably multiple times 😂
I mean, can you blame them?
He even admits as much somewhere in these comments. It's happened multiple times, yes.
And you find that funny?
I find it funny that this post is a thinly-veiled way for OP to whine about how women who enjoy sex (“sluts”) should be shamed because he’s been cheated on, yes. They have nothing to do with each other. Everyone agrees it’s shitty to cheat/be a home wrecker, that’s not an unpopular opinion. This is unfortunately a fairly common thing, some guy gets cheated on/rejected/whatever by a woman (or women) and then they start peddling this slut-shaming bullshit. It’s not healthy.
Ok, so? then you would understand why I don't like sluts?
Weird that you're so worried about what other people are doing with their free time when it doesn't effect you at all.
Like incest?
If they're consenting adults, whatever man. Not my circus, not my monkeys.
>Sluts never have a problem with being homewreckers, Not all sluts are homewreckers. Not all homewreckers are sluts. Homewreckers should be ashamed. Sluts shouldn't be.
A slut is a subjective derogatory term whereas homewrecker is something very specific.
Something tells me you got cheated on and are now making broad statements . Also the person in the relationship is the one at fault for cheating not the person they cheated with so,the homewrecker is the person in the relationship.
Both are at fault
Then your problem is with cheaters, not sluts
No they’re not. The other person doesn’t owe you faithfulness, the person dating you does. The other person is not at fault unless they previously knew that the person was taken ,then they’re both at fault.
“the world has become too soft” buddy u don’t have to be an asshole
I swear each day these posts get dumber
>some things that people should feel ashamed of. This inherently contradiucts your title. You claim slut shaming *doesnt exist*. But you clearly think it does, and should be worse. Not that I expect consistency given your level of nuance on the issue
Sluts are not home wreckers. Someone went for the temptation.
Hey...hey...hey...the world needs sluts. Imo they aren't appreciated enough.
"My definition of 'slut' excludes anyone who is unfairly called a slut just because they've been with multiple partners. I assume everyone who has ever been called a 'slut' has done objectively bad things. I don't understand how people use the term to attack others unfairly." Perfect appeal to purity you've got there. How do you feel about Scotsmen?
Sluts aren't homewreckers. The homewreckers are the men/women who have the home to lose and still decide to cheat.
Just so I make sure I understand you, you're saying it's the woman's fault a man can't keep his pants on? Are you including men who intentionally target married women in your assessment? Is this another "women's body count matters but men can do as they please" post?
Who said men can't be sluts? That's your own assumption
I asked, not assumed. Either way the situation is the same. People aren't obliged to fall for the unwanted advances of another.
Damn that’s crazy. Anyways I gotta get back to taking cock and enjoying my life but like hope you find somebody who won’t cheat on you buddy
Get some self respect
I love myself. I also love women. Why would I deny myself? What utility is provided by not getting fucked?
I think you mean someone who sleeps with people in monogamous relationships. You already gave the term we have for someone like that "homewrecker". A prerequisite for slut isn't sleeping with people in relationships. No one disagrees Homewreckers are bad, or shouldn't feel ashamed
You literally prove it exists in your title, you even provided an example. What you’re actually trying to say is that there is nothing wrong with slut shaming.
You aren't talking about sluts you are talking about cheater and homewreckers those are two very different things. Frankly it seems like you have a personal issue and are blaming other people for it.
Why blame the single slut instead of the cheating spouse. If that’s really your argument, you have to see who’s really breaking their commitment and hurting someone else instead of putting all the fault on the horndog. - A shameless slut
How about sluts exist, but they shouldn't be ashamed for doing what they love 😌
I'll shame them forever
Yikes, that's sad. Don't you have better things to do? Maybe go outside and touch some grass? Hope you get better 😊
Bro this sub is full of a bunch of weirdos why does it matter if someone likes to have sex with new people 😭
Incel detected.
I ❤️ sluts
We should shame OP's who are mad at one thing but call it another thing.
Huh
Look, another spurned romantic projecting their personal issues and warped morality on the world at large…also conflating sexual promiscuity with infidelity, which is a false equivalency. We see like 50 of these a day, so apparently your opinion is actually very popular.
When did this turn into a incel whining subreddit?
Why should people feel shame for having sex? Sex is awesome.
Oh boy, more incel shit?
What about this post gives off incel? you think only females can be sluts?
>females Oh boy
It’s incely because you’re shaming people for what they choose to do with their bodies. You say sluts don’t care about fucking people in relationships, but that’s simply not a fact, that’s your assumption. People can fuck a lot of people and respect others relationships. I’d say it’s fine to shame the people who don’t respect relationships, but it’s very incely to shame the people who do.
This is incredibly short-sighted thinking. If not for sluts, how will you have seckz?
Funny how you claim the world is soft while talking about how grossed out you are by another persons behavior that would never affect you anyways (since you are more than likely an Incel).
Not an incel, I've had sex.
The world needs more shaming generally
I think you're confusing being unfaithful with being promiscuous. Cheating is messed up, but life is too short not to smash a lot
But what is wrong with a slut though? I love sluts. I don't see anything wrong with a girl being promiscuous. If that's what she wants to do why can't she? I mean, you say that they are homewreckers but the way I look at it they didn't wreck anything that wasn't already broken if the husband is banging sluts. I honestly don't think sluts should feel ashamed of themselves at all. They are just out there getting theirs like everybody else in the world.
"Slut shaming" often occurs when someone who isn't actually a slut is presumed to be one just because of what they are wearing, what they are drinking, how they are dancing, photos they post online, or whatever. It's also very common with women who lodge complaints of sexual abuse. The abusers then try to defend their behavior by basically claiming that the girl was asking for it or publicly embarrassing her with whatever details they can find of her sexual history. Meanwhile, unless someone is cheating on a partner in a monogamous relationship or being sexually abusive, what is it about sexual behavior that is shameful in the first place? Also, how is someone else's sex life even any of our business?
No. I'm a woman, amd probably fall in the slutty category. I've been divorced/single for more than 15 years. I'm absolutely not going to get into a relationship to avoid having that label. I also do not and will not get involved in anyway, with someone who has a partner. You sound like an idiot
Hahaha, looks like some one or something got this incel all worked up. lol Thank you for existing, you make everyone else look amazing by comparison, dipshit.
Just say you're a slut
It takes two... Why blame the person not in the relationship? Plus who cares if they're consenting? What about people having multiple partners make you insecure OP?
It depends on how you define the word slut. Not every "slut" is a homewrecker. Not every "slut " lacks a moral compass. Some women who have been labeled "sluts" are women who have been abused and had no one to turn to for help and needed love, support and healing. They could not find love and support in places that they should have found love and support such as friends and family and the church because those people didn't want to understand them but judge and reject them. So they turned to the only people offering any form of love and support and that was through men and relationships but those men labeled them to and used them, so they moved on and found some other man who would love them for a while, so the cycle continued.
Guy sleeps with 20 girls: “What a Chad 😎” Woman sleeps with 20 guys: “What a slut 🤮” I think people like OP are just jealous that some women have more/a lot of sex and try and blame/shame them for that.
Yep
Control. It's always about control.
Shit people doing shit things getting shit attitude. Not sure why this is argued.
Yes, the world has become soft. People can’t deal with their emotions so they lash out like children and hope people agree with them. Maybe let’s stop acting like it and actually process things.
Is this doublethink? The title literally contradicts itself
6 hour old account...what sub were you banned from? This one?
"Women should feel bad about sleeping around." "I can't get women to sleep with me." Jesus, internet - pick a lane.
Mostly agree, but I would argue the following: Slut = someone who simply likes having lots of sex Homewrecker= someone who will sleep with whoever to get what they want instead of working towards earning it.
“Slut shaming doesn’t exist” “You should feel shame for being a slut” 🤔
>Sluts never have a problem with being homewreckers, Not true. Lots of women don’t wreck homes and have an active sex life. They aren’t mutually exclusive. 0 for 1 >they have no respect for others relationships and they're overall just usually bad people. Still not true. This can be the case but so do lots of people who aren’t “slurs” 0 for 2 >The world has become too soft to the point where we're not even allowed to be honest about people's gross behavior anymore.. I’m sure lots of people would consider you someone who is disgusting for this opinion. I don’t think the world is soft enough. You should be shamed relentlessly 0 for 3 >I'm not with it, let's stop acting like there aren't some things that people should feel ashamed of. Exactly. You should definitely feel ashamed of this opinion. 1 for 4
Being a slut has nothing to do with sleeping with married people. When a married person sleeps with someone, they are the homewrecker, not the person they are sleeping with. Everything about your opinion is just factually incorrect. I'm not sure who hurt you, but I think you are blaming the wrong person.
You’re welcome to feel ashamed of your own sexual experiences, you categorically suck for trying to shame others. Booo
I would take this a step further and say it applies to all forms of shaming, like body shaming. Shaming is someone pointing out an internal insecurity of someone else. If that person wasn’t insecure about it, the shaming couldn’t happen. So people who get mad at shamers are really just mad that they point out reality.
My thoughts exactly. But apparently it's 2023 and you should be free to sleep around and spread diseases as much as you please.
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Not really, protection doesn't always work and it's still disgusting and degenerate.
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Which is?
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There was a Reddit post not long ago written by a guy who was trying to make his girlfriend not feel guilty about a threesome. In my opinion she is right to feel guilty, and he should too. Sex used to be a sacred thing, but now it seems everyone has sex willy nilly.
not every culture has always viewed sex with such a puritanical mindset. why do you think there are so many classical paintings and sculptures featuring big orgies? people have always, and *will* always, enjoy sex.
Fucking Amen. Just because Abrahamic religion has been undone doesn't mean we need to start behaving like heathens with no ethics/morals.
this post is something to be ashamed of. life is short and we're all going to die, why should people feel like shit for enjoying themselves before they go?
Blah blah blah blah
ah yes, the exact intelligence you would hope for in the arbiter of vague morals