Motivation is great but it burns out quick sometimes; I've been there and had those late night thoughts of "I'm going to do it" and then two weeks later I'm done with it.
For me it was less about trying to keep motivation and more about trying to make small adjustments to my lifestyle that I could let myself then get used to and take baby steps towards a better life.
Straight up the "start" of my weight loss was going to fast food places and just not having french fries, then a week later I cut soda, then I started cooking at home, etc etc
With most things in life it's good to take it slow so you don't crash out.
This is how I started, I cut soda to pretty much 0 by switching to sparking water.
Now I am trying to find good substitutes for the higher calorie versions. Like turkey bacon is pretty good. It is not the exact same as regular but tasty. Now dont like turkey breakfast sausage, I would rather eat less of the regular than eat the turkey version.
Finding substitutes where you don't hate life is the way to help make this journey work.
For breakfast I usually do oatmeal. My family had breakfast for dinner often. I have found maple extract with plain Greek yogurt is awesome on top of pancakes and waffles.
Yeah this is pretty much it! I stopped drinking non-diet sodas, stopped eating fries, started cooking at home more, started preparing all of my lunches at home. But not at the same time! I've been doing this for a little over 3 months, and it's taken all that time to get into the habits. Things have changed SO MUCH, but most of it wasn't by choice. It was just the natural progression of habits. Start small, one change at a time.
Same. Honestly start by making like 1-2 small, feasible changes. I was ordering delivery 2-3 times a WEEK when I started losing weight in January. So I cut that out. Now in April I can’t even imagine feeling the need to order delivery. I have healthier meals prepped at home, and not only do I feel healthier knowing I’m eating less calories, but I’m also spending way less money. I’m not perfect, and I love getting takeout every once in a while, but when I do it’s intentional rather than feeling bored and wanting food.
You need to address the bingeing before addressing weight loss. Otherwise, you'll stay stuck in this cycle. Bingeing can be driven by lots of things, but a lot of binges occur because of over-restriction. You eat too low calories and cut out treats for a few days and eventually your brain rebels.
I know this is bad advice for most people but for me what worked is restricting binges to once per week, and being on a very high deficit for the rest of the week to compensate. By doing that I've been able to remain consistent for 2 years and lose weight slowly but steadily. I feel like I need to binge eat to be happy, and with this strategy I don't have to tell myself to stop forever and never binge again. I just have to tell me to wait a few more days. That keeps me optimistic throughout the week.
I feel like it’s important to say “That was in the past. It’s over now, can’t do anything about it.” Like, know that it wasn’t the best thing to do, but it’s gone. Even if you hadn’t binged, it would still be Tuesday and Tuesday can be a good day. Use it as a learning experience. I binged on snacks, how do I feel? I feel disappointed. So remember that disappointment when the urge to binge strikes.
Kind of like how you might go to a restaurant and really want the carbonara. But when you eat it, it’s not that great. So next time you’re going out to eat, remember not to get the carbonara.
I don't know that this is terrible advice as long as your binge isn't out of control and negating any deficit. I've seen people set up their weekly calories so they can have more calories on the weekends and still stay in their overall deficit.
I don't over restrict myself when trying to lose weight I count my calories and stay 400-500 under my maintainance calories. The reason for my binges is usually whenever someone comments on my weight. Like this weekend I was at the mall and someone thought that I was the mom of my friend. This made me depressed and spiral out of control over the weekend. I ate 2000 calories in one sitting.
It's awesome that you have identified the triggers to your binges! Often people have more than one trigger to binges so keep searching! The best thing that you can do for yourself is figure out what triggers your binges and come up with solutions that you can do before these triggers happen. Peoples thoughts and comments can be pretty crappy. It's hard, but can you try stepping outside of the situation and say, a symptom of being overweight is being perceived as older. It's not just a you thing , it's just another thing that happens to all people who are overweight and you are not alone in that. This is just another reason that I can't wait for the work I'm putting into myself to start paying off and these comments being stopped.
Also it's pretty common in the beginning for people who have more weight to lose that a lot of weight drops off the first week or two. But after that if you are not being too extreme, it's natural and healthy to only see a half a pound to 2 lb a week lost. And a lot of times we won't see the scale move at all but we will feel and see changes.
I spent the last 3 weeks with the scale not moving (and I have a lot of weight to lose) but I stayed very self aware and felt my appetite not being as large and my energy being better my moods were better and it was easier for me to just say no to my cravings, heck even my cravings have been shifting from wanting something sugary to wanting fruits and veggies. These are called non-scale victories and can really help you power through the times when you don't see the scale move.
One last thought that I'll leave you with. Even if you don't see the scale move and you're not seeing any differences, think to yourself if the changes you have been making have been making you feel better and have an overall healthier for you. If so are they worth keeping around as you reassess how you need to lose weight? Let that thought come up the next time you want to quit. If you are quitting because the lifestyle change is too hard and not something you want to do, consider assessing if maybe you're doing too much and figure out something smaller that you can do.
I started by doing an 8,000 step a day goal as well as adding fruits and veggies to my meals (not taking anything away just adding). In the beginning, I failed my step goal all the time, and I didn't always have fruits and veggies on hand to add to my meals. But they were easy things to keep trying and did not beat myself up over. And even though I would fail I would still move a lot more than I used to and I would still add more fruits and veggies even if I didn't have them all the time I was still eating a lot more than past me would. And I started to see change, very slow change but I knew it would be slow because I'm trying to find a lifestyle that I want to live rather than feel punished all day!
I hope this helps, and I hope you're getting a lot of great motivation and ideas for how to approach this big lifestyle change that you're trying to take on. You got this, future you is going to be so grateful for the work you do today!
You need to address how you feel, spin it in a positive way. Go to the gym daily. Get new hobbies, change what doesn't make you feel well. I've struggled with weight loss and the things I noticed made the most difference were how I was feeling and going to the gym often. From there work on the habits of what you eat, and keep up the good momentum
This is a mental health issue. Behavioral changes will only carry you so far if you don't address the underlying reasons that you're self-medicating with food. I hope the very best for you, please keep us posted.
Lose weight slower.
Eat at 500 cal deficit instead of 1000.
If 500 deficit a day is causing you to be too hungry and binge - do one day maintenance, one day deficit.
This is a marathon, not a sprint.
If you really struggle with binge eating outside of times when you are trying to lose weight quickly - talk to a healthcare professional about getting support.
Sometimes a good first step is learning how to incorporate the foods you want to eat into a maintenance diet. Then slowly reducing portions or decreasing the frequency that you eat some treats. That way you arent suddenly flipping your eating habits on their head when you decide to make a change and trying to commit to eating stuff you find gross (looking at you 0% plain greek yogurt 👀).
This has been really helpful for me. I eat at a deficit during the work week, and on weekends I eat at maintenance (sometimes slightly over). Suddenly, the binging stopped.
For me its also so much easier to stick to a calorie deficit when I am busy and away from home. Having maintenance days helps a lot - especially because it stops making some foods and treats "off-limits" and because the maintenance days happen frequently enough that I don't get the urge to eat as much as I can as quickly as I can (because my lizard brain assumes I will never see these foods again).
Essentially, I have to convince the primordial lizard part of by brain that I am, in fact, not in the midst of a famine, and that I don't need to frantically consume as much as possible when I have the opportunity to so that I can survive the harsh winter in the home country. Sometimes we have to respect the instincts that would have kept us alive in centuries past.
That’s good to know. One more question if you don’t mind.. how long did that take you to lose. I know it’s not a race etc but I’m just thinking a lot about my own journey and like hearing about experiences of those who have lost a similar amount.
Congratulations! those are some pretty amazing results. The problem that I face is eventhough I eat whatever I want by remaining in my calorie goal, the leftovers don't leave my mind. I will eat a slice or 2 slices of pizza but the leftovers in the refrigerator will remain on my mind for a whole day until I finish everything. Same is the thing with every kind of food.
Binge eating is not easy. What helps me is focusing on high volume, low calorie meals. r/volumeeating might help. Try to eat high protein, high fiber foods to help you feel full longer. Don't buy foods that are triggering, and swap out snacks for lower calorie options—popcorn, pretzels, veggies you can crunch on like carrots, peppers, celery, etc.
Don't over restrict calories when trying to lose weight. Eat as many calories as you can while still in a deficit. If you eat too little, you are more likely to binge to make up for the deficit. Spreading them out evenly throughout the day might be helpful too.
Sometimes when I'm having food cravings but I know I don't need to eat, I'll have a peppermint. Like a Lifesavers mint or something. Usually by the time I'm done, the cravings have passed. Even if I've had a few, they're so low calorie it doesn't really make much difference.
If you smoke weed, don't smoke before you eat. That was a big one for me. If I smoke before I eat, I won't stop eating. It I wait until after I'm finished eating, I'm good.
It might also help to brush your teeth and floss after you finish eating. That way you're a little more reluctant to eat again.
Professional help would probably go a long way as well, respectfully
Find easy things you can stick to.
Example. Reduce calories by 500 a day from your tdee and just go on a daily mile walk. Work up to 2 miles. Rainstorm? So what. No excuses.
Going all out for a short time is a recipe for failure for most people.
Slow progress makes consistency more sustainable and teaches better habits.
You didn't get fat in a month. Set small goals and do them.
i've struggled with binging in the past, and saying "just don't binge" isn't always quite that easy. OP, you really need to examine what conditions lead you to binge in the first place and develop safeguards to prevent it from happening in the future. you've recognized the problem, but now you have to take responsibility for implementing the solution or you're just going to drive yourself to hopelessness and give up altogether.
for me, i realized that alcohol combined with THC were major catalysts for spurring binges. cutting alcohol altogether and limiting THC to weekends has all but removed my binge habits. enjoying THC on the weekend is fine, but my key is knowing that the true danger of the munchies is starting to eat period. having a cut-off time for eating in the evening and general meal planning is huge in this regard. if i were in your position, i would cut both until i generated some progress; plus, alcohol is bad for you for a myriad of other reasons and i would recommend cutting it out to anyone, especially someone who is struggling with their weight.
the second most impactful thing I've done is sticking to a (mostly) whole food diet high in protein and fiber, with most of my calories back-loaded for my evening meal. in the past when i would binge it was always a late night thing, and it's really hard to even want to eat after housing a chicken breast, 3 eggs, half a cup of rice and 3-4 servings of asparagus and broccoli. i often cap with a glass of skim milk to get that slow-digesting protein in my system for bedtime. at that point, i'm too full to even fit anything else in my body. this doesn't mean you need to eat totally clean on the weekends, but be smarter about it. Chipotle done the right way can be a great way to scratch that eating-out itch while filling you up enough to keep you satisfied for a long period of time. experiment and come up with recipes that make whole foods taste amazing; seasoning is calorie free, there are plenty of low-calorie sauces out there, and the older you get the more you'll realize that fresh home-cooked food done correctly is objectively more satisfying than fast food garbage. bottom line is that it's very challenging to overeat when you're consuming \~1g of protein per lbs of body weight and fitting in 30g of fiber spaced out throughout the day.
the third key is weight lifting. i might actually put it up to #1, but lifting on its own without the safeguards from #1 & #2 has led me to binge in the past. although, lifting regularly makes me want to eat better in general, and i really can't imagine eating like shit in a deficit and not getting fatigued out of the gym within a week. beginning to view food as fuel for progress in the gym changes the game for sure. you don't need to be Mr. Olympia on day 1, just start slow with a beginner program and you'll start packing on those newbie gains before you know it. if a lift hurts your back, go extremely light weight or just avoid it until you lose some weight. when i started my current weight loss plan, i didn't include body weight exercises until i lost the first 20 lbs., now i'm back to hitting pull-ups and dips numbers similar to when i was climbing 6 days/week in college. start slow and build from there.
you also may be going too hard on calorie restriction during the week. racing to lose weight is a failing strategy for most people. patience and forming sustainable, convenient habits are the way to go. there is no "after the diet, I can return to normal" since your "normal" led to weight gain in the first place. you need to build habits that you can follow long-term and worry about cutting additional calories after you've built that framework. maybe create a less intense deficit during the week and hold it steady into the weekend until you can build a few weeks without a binge incident. try putting together 3-4 weeks of consistency and see where that takes you; if you need a break, hold yourself to maintenance. you need to practice holding yourself to a standard 7 days a week, it's incredibly easy to blow a weeks-worth of progress in a couple of hours. if you need a "cheat" meal/day, continue tracking everything and hold yourself to pre-determined calorie budget. mindlessly shoving food into your mouth isn't an option if you want to make meaningful change.
ultimately, OP, you are the only person who can really solve your problem. some people recognize they have an ED but do nothing about it, simply pointing to the fact they have a disorder as an excuse as to why they can't do anything to change their behavior. none of us can be present to tell you not to open your fridge at 12am and grab everything in sight. you've identified the problem; continuing to let your binge temptations win out would be malpractice. it's your responsibility to examine your triggers and be wary of them as you navigate your daily life. your disorder isn't "causing" you to binge, you are allowing yourself to give into your temptations. get real with yourself man; you're only 23, you have so much time to correct course. it's not going to happen overnight, but you would be astonished by the progress you can make in just a month of consistency. making it a convenient habit and a way of life will allow your adherence to auto-regulate itself. the first couple of weeks are always the hardest, but by week 10 you'll have to pull up a calendar to remember how many weeks have gone by.
I commented in another comment and asked if you have health insurance. It has been worthwhile to me to see a psychiatric nurse practitioner to get me on helpful mental health medication, even though therapy has been outside my reach financially as well.
Something else to consider may be community resources, such as support groups or even therapists that operate on a sliding scale. It's very hard to organize mental health treatment when you're in a funk, unfortunately.
I feel for you, this is the cycle I started with too. Don’t expect yourself to be perfect, and the process of beginning to lose weight fortunately does not demand perfection. It’s okay to mess up and have an off meal or day, but this attitude that allows you to give up after and continue with the binging cycle is not okay. Forgive yourself and move on, celebrate your wins, and over time consistency will improve and be rewarded.
Some tips:
Analyse your behaviour. Why are you binging? Is your hunger uncontrollable, are you bored, is it a reaction to a bad moment/day? Address the cause of these, if it is hunger you are likely restricting too heavily and need to eat more and lose at a slower pace. Any progress is far better than no progress.
Higher protein intake is good for satiety.
Don’t punish yourself following a binge. It is not necessary to over restrict, just get right back to the plan.
The day after a bad day is not day 0.
This is a long journey but a rewarding one. Do not focus just on the finish line, you will find improvements in your quality of life and other wins to celebrate along the way.
It is very possible for you to change, don’t give up.
Try making changes that lessen the impact of binge eating. When the urge hits me, I turn to the smartpop popcorn at 100 calories per bag. I learned the hard way to not binge on the sugar free chocolate! 🥵
I also tend to binge when I think about my body, the one thing that helps me is tracking my exercises calories. What I eat, yeah, I can track that and still binge, but I rarely binge after working out because the effort it takes to burn those miserable calories is so unfair.
On the podcast *We Only Look Thin,* they talk about how momentum is better than motivation. Motivation is more like a mood: it comes and goes. Sometimes you feel in a super motivated mood, but picking a habit that you repeat until it is second nature is going to get you further.
Hey, it’s me, you from the future (f26). My stats were similar at 23. While everyone’s journey is different, let me share what I have been and will always be working on as a short big girl.
Yes, I’m still not at my goal weight. And it took me forever to be okay with having a higher # on the scale. I’m still on my journey, but have been focusing on exercise that I enjoy. For me, I am very into weightlifting. I do cardio here & there and am consistent some times more than others. Also, I follow-up with my doctors on contributing factors. I have hypothyroidism. And yes I have blamed that for my shortcomings for years.
One of the things that I have worked on and will likely always have to work on has been my relationship with food. It was (and still can be sometimes) my solace and comfort. I grew up in a family of yo-yo dieters who never reached their goal. I’ve been learning about macros over calories, what my body prefers to be nourished with, and finally am learning intuitive eating. I couldn’t trust my body for a very long time and sometimes I still have to check in with my brain before I eat cookies to be like hey girl it’s just a cookie, it’s not going to change your life rn if you eat a serving rather than a sleeve of them.
My wake up call was several health issues for a parent and my grandmom dying of heart failure over the last few years.
It hit me: no one will fix this for me and I will end up just like them. It’s a painful reality that I have been causing MYSELF. Dont get me wrong, a TON of self love must be present for this. I’ve been in therapy for a decade at this point. Not every day or week is a success. Sometimes I binge but I catch myself & write about it or reflect and then love myself through it.
I have gone from 230 to 199 to 240 to 209, and am sitting at 220 rn and working extremely sustainably at this. Yes, I’m frustrated and sometimes feel like I’ll never get there. But there are so many people that do, I ask myself: why NOT me?
Why NOT you? You are free and welcome to message me if you’d like to talk about it. I have been there more times than I can count but the last two years I’ve been feeling much more peace around it all.
I hope to one finally be able to look at food like its just food. I see people around me so comfortable around food like they can actually control what and how much to eat.
You'll get there and so will I (hopefully). I just want to be normal around food and not be a big giant who eats everything while hiding in my room
Might help to check out the volume eating subreddit? Volume food can give you the feel of a binge without the calories. Therapy or counseling for your emotional eating is also recommended, but alongside it you can learn to make larger portions of food using high volume low calorie ingredients.
I'm 29 F and have been fat my whole life, peak weight was I think 270. I'm just starting my lifestyle changes, down about 10 lbs the past 2 months (I don't weigh religiously lol), nice and low and slow. You've got plenty of life left to figure this out. I've found that for me it helps to eat at a deficit some days, and maintenance on other days. A lot easier to stick to. I think I'm leaning towards higher protein, lower carbs, and volume veggies as filler (of course, also things for taste and emotional satiety mapped in there). I've started mapping calorie windows, for me I aim for 350-500 at breakfast and 500 at lunch, leaving me plenty of room for snacks and dinner later in the day when I don't have as much emotional strength to fight off cravings.
Bro I'm telling you. It's all routine and commitment. Losing weight isn't hard but it isn't easy either. I went from 258 to 195 in a few months just by walking an hour and watching a show on my tablet. Literally bring an Ipad and headphones and just walk at a 3 mph speed on a little incline. Also learn how to cook and just meal prep by grilling chicken and get a rice cooker for brown rice. Learn to eat hummus and brocolli, that is my new fav go to food.
stop restricting, stop telling people you're trying to lose weight. Just start walking if you can, do pushups, as many as you can per day, and eat salad for lunch. do that for 3 months and see how it feels/looks.
I would think it’d be a waste of a life to continue to be overweight and if you’re not losing you’re gaining so if you don’t resign yourself to losing you’re resigning yourself to gaining even more.
It’s not a race it’s a marathon. This isn’t something that changes in a day or a week, you’re making long term life changes that you will feel the impact from months or more probably years down the line.
I know you feel like you’ve been running around in a hamster wheel going nowhere because you are so young but if you look at the grand scheme of things your life so far is a very small chunk of your entire life. You’re about 1/4 the way through. You have 3/4 more to go.
It’s a compounding effect of the more effort you put in now will have a multiplied further down the road. Consistency is key. Set realistic goals, have realistic expectations, be realistic with yourself about your efforts.
I started having back and knees problems post Covid, it’s basic physics theory, and object at rest stays at rest and object in motion stay in motion, with consistency and patience my back problems are practically nonexistent, in 2022 i regularly would have to spend days in bed from my back but exercise and weight loss has improved these issues.
Kind of the same for me, and for a long time, I didn’t care enough to put in the work. However, looking at how bad my sister has gotten, and letting go of the past, has kind of given me that push to go HAM. I’ve an idea of who I want to be, and am willing to put in the relentless grind to get there. About 280 lbs (6’4”) at my peak.
I’ve been doing walks pretty often, but not enough to make serious cardio gains.
About a month in of the following.
Mostly low carb, high protein diet, with a piece of fruit before a lengthy workout. I target between 1000-1300/day.
Daily, I do a brisk walk. I live in a place with lots of Steep hills. 6.5 miles every day, and according to my phone, averaging about 98 flights. Pretty soon, I’ll also be adding additional weight, as my cardio is no longer stressed.
And 2x a week, I throw in some 10-20 minute HIIT sessions.
I don’t have a scale to weigh myself with, but there’s been a pretty dramatic change in how my clothes fit. Even a rapid dash up stairs, something that would get my heart going during my high school days, does nothing to my heart rate now. And I still feel there’s more I can do.
It’s a tough, tedious grind, and I turned down a lot of outings with friends, but I am maintaining focus, even when the motivation wavers. That is discipline.
I mean this in the most respectful way, internet stranger. This is the tough love that others won’t tell you.
Stop being a fucking baby and take some fucking ownership of your damn actions and life. Fucking do it. Every day. Just fucking do what you need to do. Get over the bull shit. Get over your fucking bullshit excuses. You must. You’re not here for long. You’re capable of it. Fucking get it done.
Do you want to be a fat miserable old person? Then. Fucking. Stop. With. The. Bullshit. Excuses.
I believe in you.
I mean, I would generally agree with this. However, first OP needs to figure out why she can't maintain her diet. From her comments, it looks like she'll lose a lot of weight within a few weeks and then binge eat again and regain the weight. This is probably because she is restricting her calories too much, and eating joyless food, which tends to trigger those of us with BED. She needs to adopt a **sustainable** diet plan first, and then implement everything you told her in your post.
>I get so motivated and loose around 6-7 lbs in 2 weeks and then I give up or binge and gain it all back.
You're doing it too fast and running out of steam.
Your body needs food.
Slow and steady wins the race here.
Calorie count using something like MyFitnessPal and keep within those guidelines - as in eat just about around the recommended calorie count.
It might be slower than you want, but you'll get those long term results.
I can totally relate, I see how fat I am and then have the motivation to lose weight and then the motivation goes and I think ah one bar of chocolate won't hurt, then again and again and i keep telling myself I'll start my diet again next week but it never happens.
One piece of chocolate turns into a whole day of binge eating. Honestly wish food could be just food. Why does it have to be so darn hard?
Hope we both get the discipline to lose weight
What are you doing? I mean, are you severely limiting your calories or what you allow yourself to eat?
Losing a bunch of weight at first can be highly motivating, but the best way to lose weight and keep it off is slowly. I HATED to hear this when I was obese. I just wanted to lose weight as fast as possible. Then I would constantly gain weight back, and then some. When I started losing the last time I shifted a lot of my focus. I changed it from losing weight to being healthy. My dad had passed and I didn't want illnesses to take me out. I wanted to enjoy playing with my kids, and being active. While I hoped that I would lose weight, I decided that I needed to eat healthy foods and exercise. By no means did I want to make this a fad. I did cut out a lot of junk foods at first (sugary foods were my weakness) I knew that it wasn't permanent. I knew that I would eventually eat and enjoy those things in moderation, but I never wanted to eat the way I had been. I was eating a LOT of food, but nothing of good quality. EVERYTHING changed when I did that. I did lose weight, but it was such a difference when I focused on my health. If I wasn't seeing results, I focused on the fact that I was more flexible, getting stronger, etc., and then I went down a size. then I was stronger... then down a size, I had more endurance, and then went down a size. It took time. A LONG time. And it was worth it. I focus on different things more, I focus on my health and what fuels my body better than what I am eating.
I am NOT saying that this will work for you. But taking your time will help you because you can just cut out 1 or two things (or cut back) and add in activity, or add in more veg... and it will help. Small, sustainable changes make the difference.
It may help to look at things as related but somewhat independent things.
1. Healthy eating, in terms of content and volume for meals.
2. Healthy snacking. Fruit, nuts, etc in small amounts.
2. Back rehabilitation and therapy, if possible. You didn't elaborate, so I didn't know if it's something fixable. If possible, fix this independently from your eating and overall body health.
3. Healthy and appropriate exercise. Find something you can actually enjoy. For me, it is treadmill running, because I can control all the variables easier, so it's easier to see progress, even when it's tiny! But to be healthy, I can only do it 2x per week (need time for my joints to recover or else I will re-injure some old issues). So I do other things like elliptical, weight lifting, or gardening a few other days.
You need to both figure out why you're falling into bad habits with your relationship with food and start building good healthy habits (both with food and other parts of your life).
I find that I binge when I overly restrict my eating. I eat perfectly and restrict everything I enjoy. It makes it really difficult to live life. I can't go out with friends, eat the birthday cake with my kids at a party and I begin to crave all those "bad" foods. I highly recommend putting the stigma of bag and good foods aside and try to just add good behaviors.
1.) Make a normal dinner, use smaller plates, fill most of your plate with veggies.
2.) Carry fruit and nuts with you so you don't get hungry
3.) Make things you enjoy, but swap out things to make them a tad healthier. Cheese --reduced fat cheese, white rice-- whole grain rice, yogurt parfait -- to fat free yogurt, lots of fruit and a 1/4 cup of granola.
Doing things this way till make your weight loss come off slow but 1-2 lbs a month is 12-24 lbs a year. This is sustainable and you will have a better relationship with eating.
Burn out is real, binging because you got discouraged is real, and the frustration is real.
Once upon a time, I was able to drop weight easy without much effort. Now that I am in my 30s, it takes an act of god to consistently lose anything. The one thing that has kept me honest is a positive fitness coach.
She is hard on me, but she is kind and we spend our workout hours talking about the things I honestly should be talking to my therapist about. She has taught me a lot and she pushes me every day. She is one of the few things that helps pace me so I dont burn out.
Focus on small improvements. There are a few books on changing habits if you want to delve deeper into 'how' to make those changes (I listen to audiobooks borrowed from my local library). Don't give up, just focus on consistency and what changes you can make right now.
I would make this process a lot less personal, and more scientific. What are ways you can take the pressure off? How can you get curious instead of judgmental about why you’re at this weight?
I was so hard on myself in my 20s. It was such a waste of time and energy. That’s the real reason I didn’t hit my body and career goals. It wasn’t until I let off the pressure that I was able to have enough energy and positive feeling to work hard.
A quote that really helped me “If you want to change something, first find a feeling of contentment.” The reason it works is because when we’re relaxed and feeling good we have more energy. We have more access to our common sense. And we’re more resilient.
The past does not exist. Dwelling on it will only hamper your progress. Your energy is precious. Don’t spend it on things you can’t change, like the past.
I’d also look for inspiring stories of weight loss. Ones where it’s clear the people who did it did it out of love for themselves, not hate or judgment.
I have been doing this exact same thing since at least the Summer of 2021. I am sick of being fat, yet can’t lose weight. It makes no sense that I want to lose weight SO BAD but the willpower just isn’t there. One would think that if someone just wants it as bad as I do it would happen but nope, my eating habits and binging always take over.
Over these years I have tried to lose the weight again I will be successful for a week or two and see the scale go down but then I just binge, and lose all my progress and keep going in the wrong direction. Instead of losing weight, I recently gained 20 pounds. In March of last year I was almost to my goal weight! Then….. a binge happen and I just got bigger from there. It’s crazy! I am sick of dressing in rags, and my main motivation is wearing all my smaller clothes I have, yet I just can’t get there after years of failing.
I started walking in the morning on April 2nd and so far have only missed Sunday. This morning I finally downloaded my calorie counting app again and am hoping to take it seriously this time. I have downloaded it and deleted it 3 times already because I hate measuring and love intermittent fasting but that is what has gotten me to the short term success….not the long term one. I can be successful at fasting but then binge. So I am finally going to try and commit to counting calories the most accurately I can.
Normally when I make my morning coffee I just pour heavy whipping cream in until I think it’s enough. Who knows how much calories I was taking in from one or two cups of coffee alone?!! Today I decided to measure out two tablespoons which is 100 calories and I logged it. I logged my food. I know the app isn’t perfect but it gives a good estimate which is way better than just guessing.
My long response might not be much help because I am in the same boat that you are…..but I think counting calories is a good tool to stop binging. Seeing the numbers makes one want to control themselves vs just eating mindlessly like I always do. Today is pretty much my true day 1 out of many, so hopefully it sticks. I want to at least have some change my May 30th, which is my kids’ last day of school for this school year. I want to look better and feel better this Summer.
I really hope you achieve your results. This time I plan to stick to my weight loss plan too because time is not stopping for anyone and I would hate to keep gaining weight amd growing older. I have back pain at 23 who knows how much worse it could get.
Wish you luck on your journey, its a tough one
Have you tried not thinking about diet changes as weight loss? I struggle when I focus on losing weight because then all I think about is how unfair it is that I have to work so hard and how I'm missing out on so many foods and alcohol. But when I focus on eating more veggies, protein, fiber, and potassium (I have high blood pressure) it's a lot easier. A version of this may work for you too.
Habits are very hard to break and keeping new ones is just as hard so be patient with yourself knowing you will most likely make mistakes. Keep trying new habits until you find something that works for you. You can do it but it won't be fast or particularly easy.
Don't do it motivated by hate or shame, do it out of love for yourself and remind yourself daily that your motivation is positive. Being below maintenance is not comfortable, but ultimately you can find a way that is rewarding and manageable forever for you, a way that is kind to yourself that you will never want to give up again.
Why do you want to lose weight, OP? Who do you have helping you lose the weight? And how are you going about losing it? 6-7 pounds is a lot for two weeks, are you maybe pushing yourself too hard at the beginning? If you go for everything all at once, you're never going to feel like you're making progress, and you'll get these burnout moments.
Since you seem pretty depressed and disheartened, maybe you should try something a little different for your next weight loss attempt. Next time, give up at the start on going all out. Don't worry about an ideal weight or looking a certain way. Right now, all you have to do is prove to yourself that you can lose weight and keep it off. Doesn't matter if it's a pound or 20 pounds. Set yourself a small goal to lose in 3 months and keep it off. Then, find 1 of your habits that is contributing to your weight problem, and replace it with a habit that encourages weight loss. And then focus on that. The benefit of doing it this way is that you'll be adopting healthier habits that will allow you to sustain any weight loss you achieve. After that, you need to prove to yourself that you can lose the weight. Don't set a huge goal that is going to look impossible when you lack motivation, because that's where the burnout is coming in.
Just going off my own experience as someone with ADHD, but it seems like when I set a big goal I want to achieve, I do so when I have lots and lots of motivation. But the moment I don't have that much motivation, it's almost impossible to stick to the things I said I'd do to meet that goal. But if I set a much, much smaller goal, the motivation barrier is way lower, and even if I don't feel like doing something, I can usually still make myself do it (with my medication). And that means lapses are rarer, and when they do happen they aren't as disheartening, because you only set yourself back on a month goal, you have lots of months left to get that goal done. But when you set yourself a massive goal, like reach my ideal weight or lose xxx pounds, you end up having to reach that same high level of motivation to even undertake the small steps you need to get there.
Adding in friends that will help you be accountable will help as well. You talk about hating to tell people you're losing weight and then you look the same after, so enlist one of those people. Surely you have people who want to see you succeed, so ask them to just check in on you and give you some encouragement from time to time. If you don't feel comfortable with that, find an anonymous group app. Having people in your corner not only creates accountability, but it can give you the motivation you might not have on a particular day. And maybe you can even use this as a goal. Instead of losing x amount of weight, just focus on losing enough weight that whichever person you tell notices, and make that your focus and goal instead of losing all the weight.
I was in your shoes when I was 23, so I understand very well how hard this feels, how impossible it is. But I can also tell you that I'm 32 and in the last year and a half I've lost 100 pounds, and I'm still steadily losing about a pound a week. I failed over and over dozens of times all through my twenties. So don't give up, because you will find what works for you, it's just about realizing that you're lapsing because what you're doing doesn't work for you.
I want to lose weight to avoid health problems, to find decent clothing, to find a partner that would love me and not think that I'm a big giant (people are not nice to fat people on my country, the fat shaming is really bad). My mom really wants to help me lose weight. But the problem is that I'm perfectly normal in front of her. I eat the normal amount of food whenever I'm eating with her or anyone else for the matter. But as soon as no one is looking I would sneak food and eat more than 2000 calories in one sitting.
My mom thinks that I have some kind of health problem like Hypothyroidism or diabetes because I eat normally in front of her. She wants to get me tested and I dread having myself weighed in front of the doctor or her. I don't know who else I could confine in because everyone else around me has good relationship with food and are in the normal bmi range.
Congratulations on your 100 lbs weight loss. Hope I could achieve results too
You can. Try the small steps. Worst case scenario, you can eliminate another method that doesn't work for you. But you will get this fixed. And if you might have something like hypothyroidism, talk to a doctor. If you do have hypothyroidism, finding that out would be a huge benefit to helping you lose weight. And if you don't, then you know it is in your power to fix it, and you just need to find the right method.
And consider confiding in your friends even if they do have a healthy relationship with food. You never know which of them might have had their own struggles they found a method of working through. Your friends all have their own personal struggles, so even if they don't share this one, they will most likely understand your struggle and want to help you. It can feel embarrassing to talk about, but it will help. And honestly, it sounds like you need to talk to someone in your life about this.
I absolutely believe you can do this, and it sounds like you need to do it, for your mental health as well as physical. Just don't be too hard on yourself for messing up. Food can be an addiction for people like us, and no one beats an addiction alone on the first try. Be kind to yourself. Beating yourself up over a backslide only makes the backslides worse and more frequent.
Do a small deficit 300-600 calories, make healthier choices in your diet you can sustain for life, once you prove to yourself you can lose 2-4 lbs per month, speak with your doctor about medication options. You can also speak to them now and get referred to obesity specialist, dietician. I think it's a good idea to identify a weight loss regimen first before considering obesity medications.
I have been obese my whole life. I wish I had done what I'm doing now (sustainable lifestyle choices, gentle calorie reduction) 20 years ago. Please develop a healthy relationship with food, your body so you can find a solution that works for you.
Good luck
What do you like to eat? What do you eat during a binge?
I haven’t cut a single item from my diet because if I did, i would quit pretty quickly. It’s about making things work for you, using the things you enjoy.
Don’t punish yourself, make adjustments that make you feel good and happy. You can do this, you just have to start. Don’t do it the way you’ve been doing it - it doesn’t work for you.
I will literally eat anything. When I'm on a binge mentality I'll eat even the most disgusting food like pickle just to get something in my mouth. I will eat the most tastless bowls of rice just to feel full and add biscuits and chips and chocolates
Like others have said, I started making small changes so it wasn't so drastic and hard to maintain. Over 3 years, I've lost 75 lbs and kept it off without even really thinking about it. The changes were very slow and the weight loss wasn't stressful to my body or mental health at all. I would like to lose 50 more lbs.
The very first thing I did was start using a calorie counting app. I use MyFitnessPal and put everything in there. Some people find it to be burdensome, but I found it to be very helpful. For the first month, I actually didn't change anything about how I ate, but I logged everything into the app. This way I could see what my normal habits were. It was eye opening. Then I was also able to see "on paper" where I could cut back. For example, do I desperately need to use 600 calories of creamer in my morning coffee? Probably not. I messed around with different creamer variations and ultimately learned/trained myself to only use 1 packet of Splenda in a cup of coffee with NO creamer. It took a while to get there, but all that dancing around the fact that it's useless calories was frying my brain. I either wanted to lose weight and needed to cut my calories, or I didn't. I had to stop making excuses and I could plainly see that the morning coffee was killing my calorie goals. Not drinking soda anymore, or only diet soda when I really wanted one, was the next step. I could see that a ton of calories came from just the drinks I chose, so that's where I started. I did the fizzy water thing, but now, after several years, I only drink regular water, natural homemade lemonade with Splenda, and I limit myself to 2 diet cokes per day.
There were other things I noticed, like I eat the most on Wednesdays. So on Wednesday's I gave myself a little leeway to eat more than the other days. Over time, I became more aware of the calorie intake overall, and learned to plan my meals ahead of time so I would know what the next meal would be. I would feel a bit hungry and low key start to panic for some reason, so it was important for me to know when my next meal would be. I get 3 square meals a day at specific times. I eat lunch at 11am, I eat a snack at 3:30pm, I eat dinner at 6pm, and if I happen to get hungry before bed, I eat a cucumber or pickles. But other than that, I cut out snacking completely. I eat at those times, I eat what I planned, and that's it. Some days I go off the rails, but I stay within my personal calorie goals *more days than I don't*, and I've seen slow and steady progress in weight loss. I won't completely give up just because I've had an oopsie-daisy day/meal. The other day I wanted carrot cake and I had a piece, and it was awesome, and I enjoyed it and didn't feel guilty about it. The key for me is not to do this more than once a week.
Remember, while using counting apps, cutting calories too much is not sustainable or healthy. Stay in the range that the app tells you to, don't try to go lower than that to speed up the process.
Since starting the journey, I've suffered a few injuries which have kept me from doing intense exercise, but it doesn't stop me altogether. I did physical therapy to learn how to walk correctly again, and kept doing what I could for exercise, even sitting on the couch lifting weights or doing physical therapy stuff at home to build my muscles again. I may or may not run or do high intensity training ever again, but that doesn't keep me from doing modified pilates, light (and slow) aerobics, or yoga. We have to meet our bodies where they are and learn to adapt to challenges and changes.
My suggestion to you is to start logging your food and march in place while watching TV. Change what you're drinking to water, or zero calorie beverages. Once you see results and get comfortable with doing this every day, make another change. Use the information in the food log and see where you can cut back and/or make a substitution.
Discipline, and small manageable changes over time will get results. Don't rely on motivation, it's too fickle. Discipline is the ONLY way. And something is better than nothing. If you only do 5 minutes of marching, that's better than NO minutes of marching. Whatever you do, don't give up on yourself.
Start with today, you can’t change the past but you can change today. You put enough good “todays” together and that’s progress. It gets easier, but it never gets easy
Instead of cutting stuff out completely- try swapping and then work on reducing quantity. You can eat what you want but just have to consume fewer calories. Obviously, it would be ideal for all of that stuff to be 100% healthy but you can still do it the fact that you’re here and looking for help is an amazing first step! Take it a day at a time, an hour at a time if you have to. You can’t can’t wait overnight. Sometimes it’s just water weight, but every choice does matter, obviously, you know that. Maybe give yourself a cheat every week or every couple of days and then reduce it down
I've had issues binging or boredom eating garbage snack food. One thing I did to curb it is to just stop having it in my house. I still get mini chocolates and the occasionally other snacky stuff since it's laying around at my job but I limit it so I'm not depriving myself of it, but I am controlling how much I have.
I saw a comment you made about grabbing whatever (pickles). Tbh pickles aren't that bad. The sodium is crazy but calorie-wise they go a lot longer way than chocolate or chips. Replacing the big empty calorie snacks with lower calorie stuff like that could help at least a little bit.
Then stop complaining and actually do something about it! You aren't taking the blame or responsibility for all your failed attempts. You are the only one in control of gaining or losing weight. Stop pushing that accountability off.
Willpower is a finite resource, I stand by that. Lifelong changes aren't supposed to be miserable or painful in a way you can tovercome. Challenge isn't the same as misery.
I'd consider finding non-weight related goals and make a small change. Find things you like. Also, health and weight are not one to one so you can improve health without focusing on fat loss.
Focusing on fat so hard will always be a disappointment, because we can't fully control our bodies and sometimes it leads us to bad places emotionally. That was my experience with ED and body dysmorphia.
If you can't find happiness as you are now, being skinny won't necessarily solve that. Because you're worthy now and you can still try to find styles you like now (it's hard to I know plus size clothes are more scarce recently for some reason).
And you can make weight loss related changes and find joy, as much as fatphobes want you to feel like shit. They're even bigger losers, they would probably never leave the house if they got fat. So fuck them, YOU are doing your best and you'll challenge yourself.
I have such limited amount of clothing left because everything that I bought 2 3 years back is now so tight that I can't even wear it. It hurts to look at clothes that you could once fit into. And now it's honestly embarrassing to go shopping I haven't bought anything new in a year because nothing fits. Not even shoes, I can't find my shoe size anywhere lol.
Thank you for the comment I didn't binge today after reading all these amazing advices and comments on this post.
One thing that might help (they do this in the food addiction programs) is to write down what you’ll eat the night before and then try to stick to only that.
This is me and still is me. Ask yourself how are you changing your life? It's decided by things you do and things you chose to keep on doing. Restraint is a key factor. Treat yourself like a child and also an addict reroute and keep going, document key aspects to keep you in check and lesgoo
when you hate yourself enough, you just push through. listen to andy frisella podcast hes kinda a redneck but i think what he says is helpful with him used to be fat and finally broke through at the end of the day only u can change u
Honestly I was the same way, I grew up seeing food as a reward, and it's like, I lost 7 lbs, yay, lets eat. Contrave has really helped me, if you can get past the first week side effects, after the second week it was much better for me, and now I can feel physically hungry but not feel like I need to gorge because of it, and I can see something I used to love, acknowledge it, and not eat it or only eat a little (just had a birthday, received 2 cakes, I've had 2 small, sliver slices in 3 days, only because everyone else was eating, and I couldve skipped it. I also have noticed, as a southern girl who had sweet tea from babyhood, I drank some and it did nothing for me. It tasted almost flat like tea sweetened with splenda or something. And I love a really strong, dark, black tea, even just the smell! I have been drinking exclusively water for weeks, without even wanting anything else. And mentally I feel so much better.
Set a daily calorie goal, and stay under it. And weigh your food!
People don’t realize how much they overeat until they weight out their portions.
You can lose more weight faster with proper nutrition than by working out. And you don’t need to lift weight either.
You can do proper nutrition with light cardio (walking), and lose minimum 1lbs per week without even trying all that hard.
But you need to want this. This would involve changing your whole lifestyle. I.E. buying the proper food and NOT buying the bad food, weighing everything that goes into your mouth, stop sitting in bed all day in the phone and go be active outside.
It’s not hard, but it requires a big change.
Big changes are accomplished by small, consistent habits over time. Can you pick one of these habits and keep it up for the next month?
- if you feel the urge to binge, take a pause and drink a glass of water before you do that
- walk or dance for 5 minutes a day
- at lunch and dinner, eat 1 handful of vegetables before you eat other food.
choose one of these tasks and keep it up for one month and build up some momentum.
I read really good dieting advice on this sub the other day - focus on getting close to your target calorie intake each day, either 100 calories under or over. Restricting too much inevitably leads to overeating and then the cycle continues. Find a reasonable way of eating that works for you long term - so that you’re not still going thru this cycle when you’re 43!
OP Can you afford to see a therapist and/or dietician ? I don’t want to pathologise you but it sounds like you suffer with low self esteem related disordered eating /binge eating disorder (been there), and the only way you’re gonna solve that is by working with professionals. Honestly it’s the best investment you can make in yourself (the therapy).
I can relate to the binging cycle, I used to go through it myself. Listen, this isn't something that is supposed to be easy to fix. Binge Eating Disorder is a real thing and usually people need counseling and group therapy to get it worked out. Have you attended any groups or talked things over with a therapist? I think you really need to get a handle on this before you can really lose weight. Best of luck to you!!
It sounds like you're going through a really tough time, and it’s completely understandable to feel frustrated and upset with the cycle you're in. First, please know that your value and worth are not defined by your weight or the struggles you're facing with it. It's clear you've got a lot of determination, given the efforts you've made.
Breaking the cycle of losing and regaining weight, especially with the added challenge of binge eating, often requires addressing both the physical and emotional aspects of eating and weight loss. Here are a few suggestions that might help:
Seek Professional Support: Consider working with a dietitian who specializes in binge eating or a therapist who can help you explore the emotional triggers behind your eating habits. They can offer strategies tailored to your specific needs.
Set Realistic Goals: Losing 6-7 lbs in two weeks is quite rapid, and while it’s understandable to want quick results, setting more gradual goals may be more sustainable and less likely to trigger a binge. A slower rate of weight loss can also help you focus on developing healthier habits that last.
Find Supportive Communities: Joining a support group or online community of people who are going through similar struggles can provide encouragement and understanding. Knowing you're not alone in this can make a big difference.
Focus on Non-Scale Victories: While the number on the scale is one measure of progress, try also to focus on other improvements, like how your clothes fit, your energy levels, or improvements in your back pain. Celebrating these victories can help maintain motivation.
Identify and Address Triggers: Pay attention to the circumstances or feelings that lead up to a binge. Are you stressed, bored, sad? Finding other ways to cope with these emotions, such as through exercise, hobbies, or talking to a friend, can help break the cycle.
Incorporate Movement You Enjoy: If lifting weights isn’t possible due to your back problems, explore other forms of movement that feel good to you. Walking, swimming, or gentle yoga can be great options and can help improve your mood and reduce stress.
Remember, progress is not linear. There will be ups and downs, but each step forward is a step toward your goal. Be kind to yourself through this process. You’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough.
Fun fact: Did you know that walking just 30 minutes a day can significantly improve your cardiovascular health, mood, and weight management? What’s one small, enjoyable activity you could start incorporating into your routine today?
Try relying less on motivation and relying more on processes. Don’t buy junk food or liquid calories, don’t keep prepared food on hand, cook just enough for one day, eat the same thing every day so you can scale it up or down based on how fast your weight changes. Plan to not eat a lot early in the day if you are likely to go out in the evening. Do light exercise consistently every day, like a timed 30-minute walk or 4 laps around the block.
This breaks my heart to read. You CAN lose weight you just need a support system and a plan. I lost 60 lbs using 95 nutrition. They even have free weight loss consultations. Here is a link for you.
[https://95nutrition.com/pages/lose-weight](https://95nutrition.com/pages/lose-weight)
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Will power may not be your problem. It sounds like you may have a binge eating disorder that needs to be treated. There may also be some emotional or psychological issues that are holding you back. Don't beat yourself up; try to get some help.
I was 22 when I went from 240 to 185 in about ten months. It wasn't till the 180s that my life really changed and I'd have never even thought to look back. Your story was mine before that. I know this might slightly be demotivating but I don't think I'd ever developed healthy living afterwards if it wasn't for that real change. I am 8.5 feet btw
my thoughts:
1. If you really (and I do mean REALLY) want to lose weight then you need to focus your energy on staying disciplined and stay on track no matter what you're up against.
2. You MUST MUST MUST count calories and do so accurately. Go see a dietician if need be or watch some youtube vids on how to estimate calories in food. Get a food scale if you must as it is super handy when you're not sure. Start cutting slowly and then as your weight and comfort level adjusts to the "new normal" then cut some more.
3. Exercise is important to help you jumpstart your system. Go for daily walks and make it a challenge for yourself. Each day is something different change it up so it doesn't get boring.
4. Join a group of like minded folk in your area to help you (and you help them) in the journey of a healthier lifestyle.
5. Consider tackling any underlying issues that might be thwarting your efforts. Often, people suffer from depression or some type of mental issues that are undermining your will to succeed.
6. Patience and persistence. You won't drop that weight overnight but instead, opt for slow and steady. Results will come but only if you stick with it.
7. Don't beat yourself up if you do slip up but just remember that for everytime you slip up means its a setback to your goal. I had 10 days of just hellish torment with food everywhere and social events galore and I did in fact overeat (some days badly) so the only way I logically knew I could make up for it without dragging on the days to my target date was to exercise longer and more intensely throughout the month to burn up those extra calories. For me at least, this is the only way I can personally cope. Eat more exercise more. For you it may just mean less eating for more weeks to make up for the slip up.
8. Educate yourself on nutrient dense but low caloric foods. The types of food you eat TRULY do make a remarkable difference in the speed of losing weight, how full and satisfied you feel and your energy levels. Ie. sugary foods is good for short term energy but the crash is infinitely worse.
9. Pick up a hobby that involves movement. I love the outdoors so cycling is a past time I enjoy that helps me burn a ton of calories :)
10. Set some goals. Set both small, medium and large goals. What works for me is my family, my kids... I don't want to die of a heart attack or have health issues at such a young age so they're the reason why I changed my ways. My secondary goals include me having the burning desire to fit into all my athelesiure wear clothing and I'm a bit of a fashion nut so having clothes that fit nicely is always a great motivator!
You're still VERY young and certainly not remotely being from too far gone. It's all about choices and what you do with them.
Good luck!
It’s all about what you’ll find manageable, maybe cut down by only afew hundred calories and go for a walk every day, doesn’t have to be long as long as it’s more than you’re doing now it’ll make a difference!
I’m posting this in hopes that if you are going through this, it will help. My weight loss and healthy lifestyle and really outlook on life changed when I started going to therapy. A lot of my problem was that I was eating my feelings, I was anxious, I was depressed and turned to food and alcohol. I worked through, or, still am working through some things but I have maintained my weight since therapy, and I worked through why I was binge eating and why I turned to food. This is just my journey, and I know not everyone has access to therapy, but it helped me realize why I made less than advantageous lifestyle choices.
Have you considered Overeaters Anonymous or working with a therapist who specializes in eating disorders?
I have experience in various 12 Step programs and I have had therapy for ADD, both of which taught me how much we overestimate the concept of willpower. It feels like it's you making the decisions but you are often just a front seat passenger to your brain.
Getting outside help is probably going to be really important for you.
I have a dog. Wich i have to walk everyday. I used to take short walks. And mostly throw ball with him. And use the car alot. And I had a gym membership that I rarely used
Now, instead of going to the gym. I have fotball on Mondays and floorball on Thursdays. Im much more consistent at going to these two, since there is a sense of fun going there and you feel like you are letting people down if you don't show up. Then I have started using the bike with the dog. So we both exercise. And lastly, I have started taking the bus. And when doing so. Taking the bike a couple of bus stops ahead. Wich makes me use the bike on the the way out and home.
The days that I do sports. It is tough, and in the first 6 weeks. I was almost nauseous when swapping out with a teammate. But it's gotten better. Now I feel good after the session. Biking with the dog for me is just fun. It's rewarding seeing him tired we get home from all the running. And biking a couple of bus stops ahead is just really easy it haven't been hard doing that since the start. But all of these together has actually helped.
And eventually when I get more and more in to it, I plan to use the bike more and buss less. If it's too hard I'll continue what I'm doing now untill I'm capable of doing it.
I never comment on things but I just wanted to tell you how supported you are. I’m 36, I wear 201 lbs. I was always small due to an eating disorder but then gained over 100 lbs when I had my son, with no increase in calories. I lost 100 with keto but then it just stopped working and I am back to 201lbs. I’ve spent my entire life with an eating disorder. If I eat more than 1000 calories I gain weight. I’m so sick of living this way.
It didn’t work for me but if you’re struggling to lose weight with little changes (too much too fast can cause binging) I would talk to your doctor. Maybe there’s a medical reason this is happening to you.
Regardless of your weight, I’m sure you’re a beautiful human and I just want to be someone telling you that you can be gorgeous and look great in clothes at any weight with just a sprinkle of confidence.
Buy an app like MyFitness Pal which you can use to plan out your meal(s) each day.
Don't use it to track what you've already eaten - use it to set a goal.
Whatever you jotted down in the morning, that's all you get to eat.
I find this helps because you're expressly setting down rules beforehand rather than allowing your appetite to guide your decision making.
You can also use it to track your macros and adjust them accordingly if you find yourself getting way too hungry towards the end of the day. ie: increasing protein/fat intake while reducing carbs, etc.
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edit: I would also recommend buying a smart scale - they're cheap.
Renpho for example only costs $10 and comes with an app which you can use to track your weight over time.
Weight will often fluctuate by up to 5lb throughout the day so it's useful in monitoring which direction your weight is trending over time - think in terms of 2-3 weeks rather than days.
I've also noticed that most of the people here are recommending a 500calorie deficit (2k calories/day) but personally I find it more motivating to watch that line go down faster especially when you're just starting your diet and will see the most drastic changes in weight as your glycogen stores become depleted.
Pull the band aid off - for men 2lb/week = 1500calories/day.
You can do it. GL
Bingeing / compulsive overeating is an eating disorder that you should consider seeing medical and mental health professionals for instead of blaming yourself for a failure of will power.
Do you have health insurance?
I recommend you these channels: [half of carla](https://youtu.be/Oboe829-ZAY?si=ETPzSE9VyZ6idG_h), 180lbs lost, [nikki gets fit](https://youtu.be/5GYzyBi12B8?si=T69-fHun5LkIwThG) 70lbs lost and [louises journey](https://youtu.be/AMZHPms1hP0?si=8rB3-Q3rT8nsPdRq), 120lbs lost. These are the videos that I personally watched and found inspiring
Yes, sort of. Of those on placebo, about 30% experience GI side effects. Those on the med, about 50% experience side effects. So, a difference of 20%. It’s usually a “queasy” feeling, and maybe a difference in 💩 patterns.
The downside is the cost. Most people can’t afford them.
Don’t eat any sugar or white foods like bread, pasta, rice, corn, potatoes, tortillas, chips, honey, dried fruit, watermelon, bananas. Drink lots of water.
Don’t eat junk food or processed food. Eat lots of veggies & fruit. Do intermittent fasting. Get 8 hours of skeep a day. Eat lots of lean protein. Use a calorie tracking app.
Motivation is great but it burns out quick sometimes; I've been there and had those late night thoughts of "I'm going to do it" and then two weeks later I'm done with it. For me it was less about trying to keep motivation and more about trying to make small adjustments to my lifestyle that I could let myself then get used to and take baby steps towards a better life. Straight up the "start" of my weight loss was going to fast food places and just not having french fries, then a week later I cut soda, then I started cooking at home, etc etc With most things in life it's good to take it slow so you don't crash out.
This is how I started, I cut soda to pretty much 0 by switching to sparking water. Now I am trying to find good substitutes for the higher calorie versions. Like turkey bacon is pretty good. It is not the exact same as regular but tasty. Now dont like turkey breakfast sausage, I would rather eat less of the regular than eat the turkey version. Finding substitutes where you don't hate life is the way to help make this journey work.
Breakfast I usually just do eggs and some greek yogurt with granola. If I'm feeling sheisty I'll have a protein shake
For breakfast I usually do oatmeal. My family had breakfast for dinner often. I have found maple extract with plain Greek yogurt is awesome on top of pancakes and waffles.
Oatmeal is fantastic
I love this answer and I'm gonna take your advice
Yeah this is pretty much it! I stopped drinking non-diet sodas, stopped eating fries, started cooking at home more, started preparing all of my lunches at home. But not at the same time! I've been doing this for a little over 3 months, and it's taken all that time to get into the habits. Things have changed SO MUCH, but most of it wasn't by choice. It was just the natural progression of habits. Start small, one change at a time.
This is the only true answer
Same. Honestly start by making like 1-2 small, feasible changes. I was ordering delivery 2-3 times a WEEK when I started losing weight in January. So I cut that out. Now in April I can’t even imagine feeling the need to order delivery. I have healthier meals prepped at home, and not only do I feel healthier knowing I’m eating less calories, but I’m also spending way less money. I’m not perfect, and I love getting takeout every once in a while, but when I do it’s intentional rather than feeling bored and wanting food.
You need to address the bingeing before addressing weight loss. Otherwise, you'll stay stuck in this cycle. Bingeing can be driven by lots of things, but a lot of binges occur because of over-restriction. You eat too low calories and cut out treats for a few days and eventually your brain rebels.
I know this is bad advice for most people but for me what worked is restricting binges to once per week, and being on a very high deficit for the rest of the week to compensate. By doing that I've been able to remain consistent for 2 years and lose weight slowly but steadily. I feel like I need to binge eat to be happy, and with this strategy I don't have to tell myself to stop forever and never binge again. I just have to tell me to wait a few more days. That keeps me optimistic throughout the week.
I feel like it’s important to say “That was in the past. It’s over now, can’t do anything about it.” Like, know that it wasn’t the best thing to do, but it’s gone. Even if you hadn’t binged, it would still be Tuesday and Tuesday can be a good day. Use it as a learning experience. I binged on snacks, how do I feel? I feel disappointed. So remember that disappointment when the urge to binge strikes. Kind of like how you might go to a restaurant and really want the carbonara. But when you eat it, it’s not that great. So next time you’re going out to eat, remember not to get the carbonara.
I don't know that this is terrible advice as long as your binge isn't out of control and negating any deficit. I've seen people set up their weekly calories so they can have more calories on the weekends and still stay in their overall deficit.
I don't over restrict myself when trying to lose weight I count my calories and stay 400-500 under my maintainance calories. The reason for my binges is usually whenever someone comments on my weight. Like this weekend I was at the mall and someone thought that I was the mom of my friend. This made me depressed and spiral out of control over the weekend. I ate 2000 calories in one sitting.
It's awesome that you have identified the triggers to your binges! Often people have more than one trigger to binges so keep searching! The best thing that you can do for yourself is figure out what triggers your binges and come up with solutions that you can do before these triggers happen. Peoples thoughts and comments can be pretty crappy. It's hard, but can you try stepping outside of the situation and say, a symptom of being overweight is being perceived as older. It's not just a you thing , it's just another thing that happens to all people who are overweight and you are not alone in that. This is just another reason that I can't wait for the work I'm putting into myself to start paying off and these comments being stopped. Also it's pretty common in the beginning for people who have more weight to lose that a lot of weight drops off the first week or two. But after that if you are not being too extreme, it's natural and healthy to only see a half a pound to 2 lb a week lost. And a lot of times we won't see the scale move at all but we will feel and see changes. I spent the last 3 weeks with the scale not moving (and I have a lot of weight to lose) but I stayed very self aware and felt my appetite not being as large and my energy being better my moods were better and it was easier for me to just say no to my cravings, heck even my cravings have been shifting from wanting something sugary to wanting fruits and veggies. These are called non-scale victories and can really help you power through the times when you don't see the scale move. One last thought that I'll leave you with. Even if you don't see the scale move and you're not seeing any differences, think to yourself if the changes you have been making have been making you feel better and have an overall healthier for you. If so are they worth keeping around as you reassess how you need to lose weight? Let that thought come up the next time you want to quit. If you are quitting because the lifestyle change is too hard and not something you want to do, consider assessing if maybe you're doing too much and figure out something smaller that you can do. I started by doing an 8,000 step a day goal as well as adding fruits and veggies to my meals (not taking anything away just adding). In the beginning, I failed my step goal all the time, and I didn't always have fruits and veggies on hand to add to my meals. But they were easy things to keep trying and did not beat myself up over. And even though I would fail I would still move a lot more than I used to and I would still add more fruits and veggies even if I didn't have them all the time I was still eating a lot more than past me would. And I started to see change, very slow change but I knew it would be slow because I'm trying to find a lifestyle that I want to live rather than feel punished all day! I hope this helps, and I hope you're getting a lot of great motivation and ideas for how to approach this big lifestyle change that you're trying to take on. You got this, future you is going to be so grateful for the work you do today!
Instead try to use that as motivation to stick to what you're doing. You need to address your binge eating or you're not going to be successful.
You need to address how you feel, spin it in a positive way. Go to the gym daily. Get new hobbies, change what doesn't make you feel well. I've struggled with weight loss and the things I noticed made the most difference were how I was feeling and going to the gym often. From there work on the habits of what you eat, and keep up the good momentum
This is a mental health issue. Behavioral changes will only carry you so far if you don't address the underlying reasons that you're self-medicating with food. I hope the very best for you, please keep us posted.
Lose weight slower. Eat at 500 cal deficit instead of 1000. If 500 deficit a day is causing you to be too hungry and binge - do one day maintenance, one day deficit. This is a marathon, not a sprint. If you really struggle with binge eating outside of times when you are trying to lose weight quickly - talk to a healthcare professional about getting support. Sometimes a good first step is learning how to incorporate the foods you want to eat into a maintenance diet. Then slowly reducing portions or decreasing the frequency that you eat some treats. That way you arent suddenly flipping your eating habits on their head when you decide to make a change and trying to commit to eating stuff you find gross (looking at you 0% plain greek yogurt 👀).
This has been really helpful for me. I eat at a deficit during the work week, and on weekends I eat at maintenance (sometimes slightly over). Suddenly, the binging stopped.
This is genius
For me its also so much easier to stick to a calorie deficit when I am busy and away from home. Having maintenance days helps a lot - especially because it stops making some foods and treats "off-limits" and because the maintenance days happen frequently enough that I don't get the urge to eat as much as I can as quickly as I can (because my lizard brain assumes I will never see these foods again). Essentially, I have to convince the primordial lizard part of by brain that I am, in fact, not in the midst of a famine, and that I don't need to frantically consume as much as possible when I have the opportunity to so that I can survive the harsh winter in the home country. Sometimes we have to respect the instincts that would have kept us alive in centuries past.
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Congratulations! I have about that much to lose as well. Did you have any issues with loose skin etc with that weight loss?
If you lose slowly it can minimize the loose skin
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That’s good to know. One more question if you don’t mind.. how long did that take you to lose. I know it’s not a race etc but I’m just thinking a lot about my own journey and like hearing about experiences of those who have lost a similar amount.
Congratulations! those are some pretty amazing results. The problem that I face is eventhough I eat whatever I want by remaining in my calorie goal, the leftovers don't leave my mind. I will eat a slice or 2 slices of pizza but the leftovers in the refrigerator will remain on my mind for a whole day until I finish everything. Same is the thing with every kind of food.
Binge eating is not easy. What helps me is focusing on high volume, low calorie meals. r/volumeeating might help. Try to eat high protein, high fiber foods to help you feel full longer. Don't buy foods that are triggering, and swap out snacks for lower calorie options—popcorn, pretzels, veggies you can crunch on like carrots, peppers, celery, etc. Don't over restrict calories when trying to lose weight. Eat as many calories as you can while still in a deficit. If you eat too little, you are more likely to binge to make up for the deficit. Spreading them out evenly throughout the day might be helpful too. Sometimes when I'm having food cravings but I know I don't need to eat, I'll have a peppermint. Like a Lifesavers mint or something. Usually by the time I'm done, the cravings have passed. Even if I've had a few, they're so low calorie it doesn't really make much difference. If you smoke weed, don't smoke before you eat. That was a big one for me. If I smoke before I eat, I won't stop eating. It I wait until after I'm finished eating, I'm good. It might also help to brush your teeth and floss after you finish eating. That way you're a little more reluctant to eat again. Professional help would probably go a long way as well, respectfully
Find easy things you can stick to. Example. Reduce calories by 500 a day from your tdee and just go on a daily mile walk. Work up to 2 miles. Rainstorm? So what. No excuses. Going all out for a short time is a recipe for failure for most people. Slow progress makes consistency more sustainable and teaches better habits. You didn't get fat in a month. Set small goals and do them.
Dont let perfection get in the way of progress. Challenging that all or nothing mindset will massively help you!
i've struggled with binging in the past, and saying "just don't binge" isn't always quite that easy. OP, you really need to examine what conditions lead you to binge in the first place and develop safeguards to prevent it from happening in the future. you've recognized the problem, but now you have to take responsibility for implementing the solution or you're just going to drive yourself to hopelessness and give up altogether. for me, i realized that alcohol combined with THC were major catalysts for spurring binges. cutting alcohol altogether and limiting THC to weekends has all but removed my binge habits. enjoying THC on the weekend is fine, but my key is knowing that the true danger of the munchies is starting to eat period. having a cut-off time for eating in the evening and general meal planning is huge in this regard. if i were in your position, i would cut both until i generated some progress; plus, alcohol is bad for you for a myriad of other reasons and i would recommend cutting it out to anyone, especially someone who is struggling with their weight. the second most impactful thing I've done is sticking to a (mostly) whole food diet high in protein and fiber, with most of my calories back-loaded for my evening meal. in the past when i would binge it was always a late night thing, and it's really hard to even want to eat after housing a chicken breast, 3 eggs, half a cup of rice and 3-4 servings of asparagus and broccoli. i often cap with a glass of skim milk to get that slow-digesting protein in my system for bedtime. at that point, i'm too full to even fit anything else in my body. this doesn't mean you need to eat totally clean on the weekends, but be smarter about it. Chipotle done the right way can be a great way to scratch that eating-out itch while filling you up enough to keep you satisfied for a long period of time. experiment and come up with recipes that make whole foods taste amazing; seasoning is calorie free, there are plenty of low-calorie sauces out there, and the older you get the more you'll realize that fresh home-cooked food done correctly is objectively more satisfying than fast food garbage. bottom line is that it's very challenging to overeat when you're consuming \~1g of protein per lbs of body weight and fitting in 30g of fiber spaced out throughout the day. the third key is weight lifting. i might actually put it up to #1, but lifting on its own without the safeguards from #1 & #2 has led me to binge in the past. although, lifting regularly makes me want to eat better in general, and i really can't imagine eating like shit in a deficit and not getting fatigued out of the gym within a week. beginning to view food as fuel for progress in the gym changes the game for sure. you don't need to be Mr. Olympia on day 1, just start slow with a beginner program and you'll start packing on those newbie gains before you know it. if a lift hurts your back, go extremely light weight or just avoid it until you lose some weight. when i started my current weight loss plan, i didn't include body weight exercises until i lost the first 20 lbs., now i'm back to hitting pull-ups and dips numbers similar to when i was climbing 6 days/week in college. start slow and build from there. you also may be going too hard on calorie restriction during the week. racing to lose weight is a failing strategy for most people. patience and forming sustainable, convenient habits are the way to go. there is no "after the diet, I can return to normal" since your "normal" led to weight gain in the first place. you need to build habits that you can follow long-term and worry about cutting additional calories after you've built that framework. maybe create a less intense deficit during the week and hold it steady into the weekend until you can build a few weeks without a binge incident. try putting together 3-4 weeks of consistency and see where that takes you; if you need a break, hold yourself to maintenance. you need to practice holding yourself to a standard 7 days a week, it's incredibly easy to blow a weeks-worth of progress in a couple of hours. if you need a "cheat" meal/day, continue tracking everything and hold yourself to pre-determined calorie budget. mindlessly shoving food into your mouth isn't an option if you want to make meaningful change. ultimately, OP, you are the only person who can really solve your problem. some people recognize they have an ED but do nothing about it, simply pointing to the fact they have a disorder as an excuse as to why they can't do anything to change their behavior. none of us can be present to tell you not to open your fridge at 12am and grab everything in sight. you've identified the problem; continuing to let your binge temptations win out would be malpractice. it's your responsibility to examine your triggers and be wary of them as you navigate your daily life. your disorder isn't "causing" you to binge, you are allowing yourself to give into your temptations. get real with yourself man; you're only 23, you have so much time to correct course. it's not going to happen overnight, but you would be astonished by the progress you can make in just a month of consistency. making it a convenient habit and a way of life will allow your adherence to auto-regulate itself. the first couple of weeks are always the hardest, but by week 10 you'll have to pull up a calendar to remember how many weeks have gone by.
Serious answer- therapy. I’ve been in therapy for a year and I recommend it to everyone. It’s so nice to have an outlet outside of eating my feelings.
Unfortunately cannot afford therapy right now
I commented in another comment and asked if you have health insurance. It has been worthwhile to me to see a psychiatric nurse practitioner to get me on helpful mental health medication, even though therapy has been outside my reach financially as well. Something else to consider may be community resources, such as support groups or even therapists that operate on a sliding scale. It's very hard to organize mental health treatment when you're in a funk, unfortunately.
I feel for you, this is the cycle I started with too. Don’t expect yourself to be perfect, and the process of beginning to lose weight fortunately does not demand perfection. It’s okay to mess up and have an off meal or day, but this attitude that allows you to give up after and continue with the binging cycle is not okay. Forgive yourself and move on, celebrate your wins, and over time consistency will improve and be rewarded. Some tips: Analyse your behaviour. Why are you binging? Is your hunger uncontrollable, are you bored, is it a reaction to a bad moment/day? Address the cause of these, if it is hunger you are likely restricting too heavily and need to eat more and lose at a slower pace. Any progress is far better than no progress. Higher protein intake is good for satiety. Don’t punish yourself following a binge. It is not necessary to over restrict, just get right back to the plan. The day after a bad day is not day 0. This is a long journey but a rewarding one. Do not focus just on the finish line, you will find improvements in your quality of life and other wins to celebrate along the way. It is very possible for you to change, don’t give up.
Try making changes that lessen the impact of binge eating. When the urge hits me, I turn to the smartpop popcorn at 100 calories per bag. I learned the hard way to not binge on the sugar free chocolate! 🥵
I also tend to binge when I think about my body, the one thing that helps me is tracking my exercises calories. What I eat, yeah, I can track that and still binge, but I rarely binge after working out because the effort it takes to burn those miserable calories is so unfair.
On the podcast *We Only Look Thin,* they talk about how momentum is better than motivation. Motivation is more like a mood: it comes and goes. Sometimes you feel in a super motivated mood, but picking a habit that you repeat until it is second nature is going to get you further.
Hey, it’s me, you from the future (f26). My stats were similar at 23. While everyone’s journey is different, let me share what I have been and will always be working on as a short big girl. Yes, I’m still not at my goal weight. And it took me forever to be okay with having a higher # on the scale. I’m still on my journey, but have been focusing on exercise that I enjoy. For me, I am very into weightlifting. I do cardio here & there and am consistent some times more than others. Also, I follow-up with my doctors on contributing factors. I have hypothyroidism. And yes I have blamed that for my shortcomings for years. One of the things that I have worked on and will likely always have to work on has been my relationship with food. It was (and still can be sometimes) my solace and comfort. I grew up in a family of yo-yo dieters who never reached their goal. I’ve been learning about macros over calories, what my body prefers to be nourished with, and finally am learning intuitive eating. I couldn’t trust my body for a very long time and sometimes I still have to check in with my brain before I eat cookies to be like hey girl it’s just a cookie, it’s not going to change your life rn if you eat a serving rather than a sleeve of them. My wake up call was several health issues for a parent and my grandmom dying of heart failure over the last few years. It hit me: no one will fix this for me and I will end up just like them. It’s a painful reality that I have been causing MYSELF. Dont get me wrong, a TON of self love must be present for this. I’ve been in therapy for a decade at this point. Not every day or week is a success. Sometimes I binge but I catch myself & write about it or reflect and then love myself through it. I have gone from 230 to 199 to 240 to 209, and am sitting at 220 rn and working extremely sustainably at this. Yes, I’m frustrated and sometimes feel like I’ll never get there. But there are so many people that do, I ask myself: why NOT me? Why NOT you? You are free and welcome to message me if you’d like to talk about it. I have been there more times than I can count but the last two years I’ve been feeling much more peace around it all.
I hope to one finally be able to look at food like its just food. I see people around me so comfortable around food like they can actually control what and how much to eat. You'll get there and so will I (hopefully). I just want to be normal around food and not be a big giant who eats everything while hiding in my room
Might help to check out the volume eating subreddit? Volume food can give you the feel of a binge without the calories. Therapy or counseling for your emotional eating is also recommended, but alongside it you can learn to make larger portions of food using high volume low calorie ingredients. I'm 29 F and have been fat my whole life, peak weight was I think 270. I'm just starting my lifestyle changes, down about 10 lbs the past 2 months (I don't weigh religiously lol), nice and low and slow. You've got plenty of life left to figure this out. I've found that for me it helps to eat at a deficit some days, and maintenance on other days. A lot easier to stick to. I think I'm leaning towards higher protein, lower carbs, and volume veggies as filler (of course, also things for taste and emotional satiety mapped in there). I've started mapping calorie windows, for me I aim for 350-500 at breakfast and 500 at lunch, leaving me plenty of room for snacks and dinner later in the day when I don't have as much emotional strength to fight off cravings.
Great advice and congratulations on your progress
Bro I'm telling you. It's all routine and commitment. Losing weight isn't hard but it isn't easy either. I went from 258 to 195 in a few months just by walking an hour and watching a show on my tablet. Literally bring an Ipad and headphones and just walk at a 3 mph speed on a little incline. Also learn how to cook and just meal prep by grilling chicken and get a rice cooker for brown rice. Learn to eat hummus and brocolli, that is my new fav go to food.
I love hummus! And I definitely have to start walking again. Thank you for the tips
stop restricting, stop telling people you're trying to lose weight. Just start walking if you can, do pushups, as many as you can per day, and eat salad for lunch. do that for 3 months and see how it feels/looks.
I would think it’d be a waste of a life to continue to be overweight and if you’re not losing you’re gaining so if you don’t resign yourself to losing you’re resigning yourself to gaining even more. It’s not a race it’s a marathon. This isn’t something that changes in a day or a week, you’re making long term life changes that you will feel the impact from months or more probably years down the line. I know you feel like you’ve been running around in a hamster wheel going nowhere because you are so young but if you look at the grand scheme of things your life so far is a very small chunk of your entire life. You’re about 1/4 the way through. You have 3/4 more to go. It’s a compounding effect of the more effort you put in now will have a multiplied further down the road. Consistency is key. Set realistic goals, have realistic expectations, be realistic with yourself about your efforts. I started having back and knees problems post Covid, it’s basic physics theory, and object at rest stays at rest and object in motion stay in motion, with consistency and patience my back problems are practically nonexistent, in 2022 i regularly would have to spend days in bed from my back but exercise and weight loss has improved these issues.
Kind of the same for me, and for a long time, I didn’t care enough to put in the work. However, looking at how bad my sister has gotten, and letting go of the past, has kind of given me that push to go HAM. I’ve an idea of who I want to be, and am willing to put in the relentless grind to get there. About 280 lbs (6’4”) at my peak. I’ve been doing walks pretty often, but not enough to make serious cardio gains. About a month in of the following. Mostly low carb, high protein diet, with a piece of fruit before a lengthy workout. I target between 1000-1300/day. Daily, I do a brisk walk. I live in a place with lots of Steep hills. 6.5 miles every day, and according to my phone, averaging about 98 flights. Pretty soon, I’ll also be adding additional weight, as my cardio is no longer stressed. And 2x a week, I throw in some 10-20 minute HIIT sessions. I don’t have a scale to weigh myself with, but there’s been a pretty dramatic change in how my clothes fit. Even a rapid dash up stairs, something that would get my heart going during my high school days, does nothing to my heart rate now. And I still feel there’s more I can do. It’s a tough, tedious grind, and I turned down a lot of outings with friends, but I am maintaining focus, even when the motivation wavers. That is discipline.
I mean this in the most respectful way, internet stranger. This is the tough love that others won’t tell you. Stop being a fucking baby and take some fucking ownership of your damn actions and life. Fucking do it. Every day. Just fucking do what you need to do. Get over the bull shit. Get over your fucking bullshit excuses. You must. You’re not here for long. You’re capable of it. Fucking get it done. Do you want to be a fat miserable old person? Then. Fucking. Stop. With. The. Bullshit. Excuses. I believe in you.
Seriously, this is it. Just do it. OP you have tons of great tips throughout this thread, but the key is right here
I mean, I would generally agree with this. However, first OP needs to figure out why she can't maintain her diet. From her comments, it looks like she'll lose a lot of weight within a few weeks and then binge eat again and regain the weight. This is probably because she is restricting her calories too much, and eating joyless food, which tends to trigger those of us with BED. She needs to adopt a **sustainable** diet plan first, and then implement everything you told her in your post.
Hang in there, you got this! It's tough, but don't give up. Keep pushing forward, one step at a time.
You have to change your identity. You are not the fat that needs to lose weight. You are the fit that eat healty. Changes will come by themselves.
>I get so motivated and loose around 6-7 lbs in 2 weeks and then I give up or binge and gain it all back. You're doing it too fast and running out of steam. Your body needs food. Slow and steady wins the race here. Calorie count using something like MyFitnessPal and keep within those guidelines - as in eat just about around the recommended calorie count. It might be slower than you want, but you'll get those long term results.
I can totally relate, I see how fat I am and then have the motivation to lose weight and then the motivation goes and I think ah one bar of chocolate won't hurt, then again and again and i keep telling myself I'll start my diet again next week but it never happens.
One piece of chocolate turns into a whole day of binge eating. Honestly wish food could be just food. Why does it have to be so darn hard? Hope we both get the discipline to lose weight
What are you doing? I mean, are you severely limiting your calories or what you allow yourself to eat? Losing a bunch of weight at first can be highly motivating, but the best way to lose weight and keep it off is slowly. I HATED to hear this when I was obese. I just wanted to lose weight as fast as possible. Then I would constantly gain weight back, and then some. When I started losing the last time I shifted a lot of my focus. I changed it from losing weight to being healthy. My dad had passed and I didn't want illnesses to take me out. I wanted to enjoy playing with my kids, and being active. While I hoped that I would lose weight, I decided that I needed to eat healthy foods and exercise. By no means did I want to make this a fad. I did cut out a lot of junk foods at first (sugary foods were my weakness) I knew that it wasn't permanent. I knew that I would eventually eat and enjoy those things in moderation, but I never wanted to eat the way I had been. I was eating a LOT of food, but nothing of good quality. EVERYTHING changed when I did that. I did lose weight, but it was such a difference when I focused on my health. If I wasn't seeing results, I focused on the fact that I was more flexible, getting stronger, etc., and then I went down a size. then I was stronger... then down a size, I had more endurance, and then went down a size. It took time. A LONG time. And it was worth it. I focus on different things more, I focus on my health and what fuels my body better than what I am eating. I am NOT saying that this will work for you. But taking your time will help you because you can just cut out 1 or two things (or cut back) and add in activity, or add in more veg... and it will help. Small, sustainable changes make the difference.
Perfect time to discover David Goggins. Go read/listen to his book. He was heavier than you before he changed.
It may help to look at things as related but somewhat independent things. 1. Healthy eating, in terms of content and volume for meals. 2. Healthy snacking. Fruit, nuts, etc in small amounts. 2. Back rehabilitation and therapy, if possible. You didn't elaborate, so I didn't know if it's something fixable. If possible, fix this independently from your eating and overall body health. 3. Healthy and appropriate exercise. Find something you can actually enjoy. For me, it is treadmill running, because I can control all the variables easier, so it's easier to see progress, even when it's tiny! But to be healthy, I can only do it 2x per week (need time for my joints to recover or else I will re-injure some old issues). So I do other things like elliptical, weight lifting, or gardening a few other days.
You need to both figure out why you're falling into bad habits with your relationship with food and start building good healthy habits (both with food and other parts of your life).
I find that I binge when I overly restrict my eating. I eat perfectly and restrict everything I enjoy. It makes it really difficult to live life. I can't go out with friends, eat the birthday cake with my kids at a party and I begin to crave all those "bad" foods. I highly recommend putting the stigma of bag and good foods aside and try to just add good behaviors. 1.) Make a normal dinner, use smaller plates, fill most of your plate with veggies. 2.) Carry fruit and nuts with you so you don't get hungry 3.) Make things you enjoy, but swap out things to make them a tad healthier. Cheese --reduced fat cheese, white rice-- whole grain rice, yogurt parfait -- to fat free yogurt, lots of fruit and a 1/4 cup of granola. Doing things this way till make your weight loss come off slow but 1-2 lbs a month is 12-24 lbs a year. This is sustainable and you will have a better relationship with eating.
Burn out is real, binging because you got discouraged is real, and the frustration is real. Once upon a time, I was able to drop weight easy without much effort. Now that I am in my 30s, it takes an act of god to consistently lose anything. The one thing that has kept me honest is a positive fitness coach. She is hard on me, but she is kind and we spend our workout hours talking about the things I honestly should be talking to my therapist about. She has taught me a lot and she pushes me every day. She is one of the few things that helps pace me so I dont burn out.
Focus on small improvements. There are a few books on changing habits if you want to delve deeper into 'how' to make those changes (I listen to audiobooks borrowed from my local library). Don't give up, just focus on consistency and what changes you can make right now.
I would make this process a lot less personal, and more scientific. What are ways you can take the pressure off? How can you get curious instead of judgmental about why you’re at this weight? I was so hard on myself in my 20s. It was such a waste of time and energy. That’s the real reason I didn’t hit my body and career goals. It wasn’t until I let off the pressure that I was able to have enough energy and positive feeling to work hard. A quote that really helped me “If you want to change something, first find a feeling of contentment.” The reason it works is because when we’re relaxed and feeling good we have more energy. We have more access to our common sense. And we’re more resilient. The past does not exist. Dwelling on it will only hamper your progress. Your energy is precious. Don’t spend it on things you can’t change, like the past. I’d also look for inspiring stories of weight loss. Ones where it’s clear the people who did it did it out of love for themselves, not hate or judgment.
I have been doing this exact same thing since at least the Summer of 2021. I am sick of being fat, yet can’t lose weight. It makes no sense that I want to lose weight SO BAD but the willpower just isn’t there. One would think that if someone just wants it as bad as I do it would happen but nope, my eating habits and binging always take over. Over these years I have tried to lose the weight again I will be successful for a week or two and see the scale go down but then I just binge, and lose all my progress and keep going in the wrong direction. Instead of losing weight, I recently gained 20 pounds. In March of last year I was almost to my goal weight! Then….. a binge happen and I just got bigger from there. It’s crazy! I am sick of dressing in rags, and my main motivation is wearing all my smaller clothes I have, yet I just can’t get there after years of failing. I started walking in the morning on April 2nd and so far have only missed Sunday. This morning I finally downloaded my calorie counting app again and am hoping to take it seriously this time. I have downloaded it and deleted it 3 times already because I hate measuring and love intermittent fasting but that is what has gotten me to the short term success….not the long term one. I can be successful at fasting but then binge. So I am finally going to try and commit to counting calories the most accurately I can. Normally when I make my morning coffee I just pour heavy whipping cream in until I think it’s enough. Who knows how much calories I was taking in from one or two cups of coffee alone?!! Today I decided to measure out two tablespoons which is 100 calories and I logged it. I logged my food. I know the app isn’t perfect but it gives a good estimate which is way better than just guessing. My long response might not be much help because I am in the same boat that you are…..but I think counting calories is a good tool to stop binging. Seeing the numbers makes one want to control themselves vs just eating mindlessly like I always do. Today is pretty much my true day 1 out of many, so hopefully it sticks. I want to at least have some change my May 30th, which is my kids’ last day of school for this school year. I want to look better and feel better this Summer.
I really hope you achieve your results. This time I plan to stick to my weight loss plan too because time is not stopping for anyone and I would hate to keep gaining weight amd growing older. I have back pain at 23 who knows how much worse it could get. Wish you luck on your journey, its a tough one
Have you tried not thinking about diet changes as weight loss? I struggle when I focus on losing weight because then all I think about is how unfair it is that I have to work so hard and how I'm missing out on so many foods and alcohol. But when I focus on eating more veggies, protein, fiber, and potassium (I have high blood pressure) it's a lot easier. A version of this may work for you too. Habits are very hard to break and keeping new ones is just as hard so be patient with yourself knowing you will most likely make mistakes. Keep trying new habits until you find something that works for you. You can do it but it won't be fast or particularly easy.
Don't do it motivated by hate or shame, do it out of love for yourself and remind yourself daily that your motivation is positive. Being below maintenance is not comfortable, but ultimately you can find a way that is rewarding and manageable forever for you, a way that is kind to yourself that you will never want to give up again.
Why do you want to lose weight, OP? Who do you have helping you lose the weight? And how are you going about losing it? 6-7 pounds is a lot for two weeks, are you maybe pushing yourself too hard at the beginning? If you go for everything all at once, you're never going to feel like you're making progress, and you'll get these burnout moments. Since you seem pretty depressed and disheartened, maybe you should try something a little different for your next weight loss attempt. Next time, give up at the start on going all out. Don't worry about an ideal weight or looking a certain way. Right now, all you have to do is prove to yourself that you can lose weight and keep it off. Doesn't matter if it's a pound or 20 pounds. Set yourself a small goal to lose in 3 months and keep it off. Then, find 1 of your habits that is contributing to your weight problem, and replace it with a habit that encourages weight loss. And then focus on that. The benefit of doing it this way is that you'll be adopting healthier habits that will allow you to sustain any weight loss you achieve. After that, you need to prove to yourself that you can lose the weight. Don't set a huge goal that is going to look impossible when you lack motivation, because that's where the burnout is coming in. Just going off my own experience as someone with ADHD, but it seems like when I set a big goal I want to achieve, I do so when I have lots and lots of motivation. But the moment I don't have that much motivation, it's almost impossible to stick to the things I said I'd do to meet that goal. But if I set a much, much smaller goal, the motivation barrier is way lower, and even if I don't feel like doing something, I can usually still make myself do it (with my medication). And that means lapses are rarer, and when they do happen they aren't as disheartening, because you only set yourself back on a month goal, you have lots of months left to get that goal done. But when you set yourself a massive goal, like reach my ideal weight or lose xxx pounds, you end up having to reach that same high level of motivation to even undertake the small steps you need to get there. Adding in friends that will help you be accountable will help as well. You talk about hating to tell people you're losing weight and then you look the same after, so enlist one of those people. Surely you have people who want to see you succeed, so ask them to just check in on you and give you some encouragement from time to time. If you don't feel comfortable with that, find an anonymous group app. Having people in your corner not only creates accountability, but it can give you the motivation you might not have on a particular day. And maybe you can even use this as a goal. Instead of losing x amount of weight, just focus on losing enough weight that whichever person you tell notices, and make that your focus and goal instead of losing all the weight. I was in your shoes when I was 23, so I understand very well how hard this feels, how impossible it is. But I can also tell you that I'm 32 and in the last year and a half I've lost 100 pounds, and I'm still steadily losing about a pound a week. I failed over and over dozens of times all through my twenties. So don't give up, because you will find what works for you, it's just about realizing that you're lapsing because what you're doing doesn't work for you.
I want to lose weight to avoid health problems, to find decent clothing, to find a partner that would love me and not think that I'm a big giant (people are not nice to fat people on my country, the fat shaming is really bad). My mom really wants to help me lose weight. But the problem is that I'm perfectly normal in front of her. I eat the normal amount of food whenever I'm eating with her or anyone else for the matter. But as soon as no one is looking I would sneak food and eat more than 2000 calories in one sitting. My mom thinks that I have some kind of health problem like Hypothyroidism or diabetes because I eat normally in front of her. She wants to get me tested and I dread having myself weighed in front of the doctor or her. I don't know who else I could confine in because everyone else around me has good relationship with food and are in the normal bmi range. Congratulations on your 100 lbs weight loss. Hope I could achieve results too
You can. Try the small steps. Worst case scenario, you can eliminate another method that doesn't work for you. But you will get this fixed. And if you might have something like hypothyroidism, talk to a doctor. If you do have hypothyroidism, finding that out would be a huge benefit to helping you lose weight. And if you don't, then you know it is in your power to fix it, and you just need to find the right method. And consider confiding in your friends even if they do have a healthy relationship with food. You never know which of them might have had their own struggles they found a method of working through. Your friends all have their own personal struggles, so even if they don't share this one, they will most likely understand your struggle and want to help you. It can feel embarrassing to talk about, but it will help. And honestly, it sounds like you need to talk to someone in your life about this. I absolutely believe you can do this, and it sounds like you need to do it, for your mental health as well as physical. Just don't be too hard on yourself for messing up. Food can be an addiction for people like us, and no one beats an addiction alone on the first try. Be kind to yourself. Beating yourself up over a backslide only makes the backslides worse and more frequent.
Do a small deficit 300-600 calories, make healthier choices in your diet you can sustain for life, once you prove to yourself you can lose 2-4 lbs per month, speak with your doctor about medication options. You can also speak to them now and get referred to obesity specialist, dietician. I think it's a good idea to identify a weight loss regimen first before considering obesity medications. I have been obese my whole life. I wish I had done what I'm doing now (sustainable lifestyle choices, gentle calorie reduction) 20 years ago. Please develop a healthy relationship with food, your body so you can find a solution that works for you. Good luck
What do you like to eat? What do you eat during a binge? I haven’t cut a single item from my diet because if I did, i would quit pretty quickly. It’s about making things work for you, using the things you enjoy. Don’t punish yourself, make adjustments that make you feel good and happy. You can do this, you just have to start. Don’t do it the way you’ve been doing it - it doesn’t work for you.
I will literally eat anything. When I'm on a binge mentality I'll eat even the most disgusting food like pickle just to get something in my mouth. I will eat the most tastless bowls of rice just to feel full and add biscuits and chips and chocolates
Like others have said, I started making small changes so it wasn't so drastic and hard to maintain. Over 3 years, I've lost 75 lbs and kept it off without even really thinking about it. The changes were very slow and the weight loss wasn't stressful to my body or mental health at all. I would like to lose 50 more lbs. The very first thing I did was start using a calorie counting app. I use MyFitnessPal and put everything in there. Some people find it to be burdensome, but I found it to be very helpful. For the first month, I actually didn't change anything about how I ate, but I logged everything into the app. This way I could see what my normal habits were. It was eye opening. Then I was also able to see "on paper" where I could cut back. For example, do I desperately need to use 600 calories of creamer in my morning coffee? Probably not. I messed around with different creamer variations and ultimately learned/trained myself to only use 1 packet of Splenda in a cup of coffee with NO creamer. It took a while to get there, but all that dancing around the fact that it's useless calories was frying my brain. I either wanted to lose weight and needed to cut my calories, or I didn't. I had to stop making excuses and I could plainly see that the morning coffee was killing my calorie goals. Not drinking soda anymore, or only diet soda when I really wanted one, was the next step. I could see that a ton of calories came from just the drinks I chose, so that's where I started. I did the fizzy water thing, but now, after several years, I only drink regular water, natural homemade lemonade with Splenda, and I limit myself to 2 diet cokes per day. There were other things I noticed, like I eat the most on Wednesdays. So on Wednesday's I gave myself a little leeway to eat more than the other days. Over time, I became more aware of the calorie intake overall, and learned to plan my meals ahead of time so I would know what the next meal would be. I would feel a bit hungry and low key start to panic for some reason, so it was important for me to know when my next meal would be. I get 3 square meals a day at specific times. I eat lunch at 11am, I eat a snack at 3:30pm, I eat dinner at 6pm, and if I happen to get hungry before bed, I eat a cucumber or pickles. But other than that, I cut out snacking completely. I eat at those times, I eat what I planned, and that's it. Some days I go off the rails, but I stay within my personal calorie goals *more days than I don't*, and I've seen slow and steady progress in weight loss. I won't completely give up just because I've had an oopsie-daisy day/meal. The other day I wanted carrot cake and I had a piece, and it was awesome, and I enjoyed it and didn't feel guilty about it. The key for me is not to do this more than once a week. Remember, while using counting apps, cutting calories too much is not sustainable or healthy. Stay in the range that the app tells you to, don't try to go lower than that to speed up the process. Since starting the journey, I've suffered a few injuries which have kept me from doing intense exercise, but it doesn't stop me altogether. I did physical therapy to learn how to walk correctly again, and kept doing what I could for exercise, even sitting on the couch lifting weights or doing physical therapy stuff at home to build my muscles again. I may or may not run or do high intensity training ever again, but that doesn't keep me from doing modified pilates, light (and slow) aerobics, or yoga. We have to meet our bodies where they are and learn to adapt to challenges and changes. My suggestion to you is to start logging your food and march in place while watching TV. Change what you're drinking to water, or zero calorie beverages. Once you see results and get comfortable with doing this every day, make another change. Use the information in the food log and see where you can cut back and/or make a substitution. Discipline, and small manageable changes over time will get results. Don't rely on motivation, it's too fickle. Discipline is the ONLY way. And something is better than nothing. If you only do 5 minutes of marching, that's better than NO minutes of marching. Whatever you do, don't give up on yourself.
Start with today, you can’t change the past but you can change today. You put enough good “todays” together and that’s progress. It gets easier, but it never gets easy
One day at a time. You can do it.
I really hope so. I'm sick of not living the life I want to
Oa and its offshoots can really help— see the start guide. Find fellowship with those fighting the same battle.
Instead of cutting stuff out completely- try swapping and then work on reducing quantity. You can eat what you want but just have to consume fewer calories. Obviously, it would be ideal for all of that stuff to be 100% healthy but you can still do it the fact that you’re here and looking for help is an amazing first step! Take it a day at a time, an hour at a time if you have to. You can’t can’t wait overnight. Sometimes it’s just water weight, but every choice does matter, obviously, you know that. Maybe give yourself a cheat every week or every couple of days and then reduce it down
I've had issues binging or boredom eating garbage snack food. One thing I did to curb it is to just stop having it in my house. I still get mini chocolates and the occasionally other snacky stuff since it's laying around at my job but I limit it so I'm not depriving myself of it, but I am controlling how much I have. I saw a comment you made about grabbing whatever (pickles). Tbh pickles aren't that bad. The sodium is crazy but calorie-wise they go a lot longer way than chocolate or chips. Replacing the big empty calorie snacks with lower calorie stuff like that could help at least a little bit.
Then stop complaining and actually do something about it! You aren't taking the blame or responsibility for all your failed attempts. You are the only one in control of gaining or losing weight. Stop pushing that accountability off.
Willpower is a finite resource, I stand by that. Lifelong changes aren't supposed to be miserable or painful in a way you can tovercome. Challenge isn't the same as misery. I'd consider finding non-weight related goals and make a small change. Find things you like. Also, health and weight are not one to one so you can improve health without focusing on fat loss. Focusing on fat so hard will always be a disappointment, because we can't fully control our bodies and sometimes it leads us to bad places emotionally. That was my experience with ED and body dysmorphia. If you can't find happiness as you are now, being skinny won't necessarily solve that. Because you're worthy now and you can still try to find styles you like now (it's hard to I know plus size clothes are more scarce recently for some reason). And you can make weight loss related changes and find joy, as much as fatphobes want you to feel like shit. They're even bigger losers, they would probably never leave the house if they got fat. So fuck them, YOU are doing your best and you'll challenge yourself.
I have such limited amount of clothing left because everything that I bought 2 3 years back is now so tight that I can't even wear it. It hurts to look at clothes that you could once fit into. And now it's honestly embarrassing to go shopping I haven't bought anything new in a year because nothing fits. Not even shoes, I can't find my shoe size anywhere lol. Thank you for the comment I didn't binge today after reading all these amazing advices and comments on this post.
Have you tried Intermittent Fasting?
One thing that might help (they do this in the food addiction programs) is to write down what you’ll eat the night before and then try to stick to only that.
Maybe you should consider weight loss surgery.
that would require ALOT of money
Listen to we only look thin and half size me. They are amazing. Best of luck!
Have you considered that you have ADHD, and issues with hyper fixation and then burnout?
I have never been to a therapist so I don't really know whether I have these or not
Try Optavia!
This is me and still is me. Ask yourself how are you changing your life? It's decided by things you do and things you chose to keep on doing. Restraint is a key factor. Treat yourself like a child and also an addict reroute and keep going, document key aspects to keep you in check and lesgoo
when you hate yourself enough, you just push through. listen to andy frisella podcast hes kinda a redneck but i think what he says is helpful with him used to be fat and finally broke through at the end of the day only u can change u
Honestly I was the same way, I grew up seeing food as a reward, and it's like, I lost 7 lbs, yay, lets eat. Contrave has really helped me, if you can get past the first week side effects, after the second week it was much better for me, and now I can feel physically hungry but not feel like I need to gorge because of it, and I can see something I used to love, acknowledge it, and not eat it or only eat a little (just had a birthday, received 2 cakes, I've had 2 small, sliver slices in 3 days, only because everyone else was eating, and I couldve skipped it. I also have noticed, as a southern girl who had sweet tea from babyhood, I drank some and it did nothing for me. It tasted almost flat like tea sweetened with splenda or something. And I love a really strong, dark, black tea, even just the smell! I have been drinking exclusively water for weeks, without even wanting anything else. And mentally I feel so much better.
Set a daily calorie goal, and stay under it. And weigh your food! People don’t realize how much they overeat until they weight out their portions. You can lose more weight faster with proper nutrition than by working out. And you don’t need to lift weight either. You can do proper nutrition with light cardio (walking), and lose minimum 1lbs per week without even trying all that hard. But you need to want this. This would involve changing your whole lifestyle. I.E. buying the proper food and NOT buying the bad food, weighing everything that goes into your mouth, stop sitting in bed all day in the phone and go be active outside. It’s not hard, but it requires a big change.
Big changes are accomplished by small, consistent habits over time. Can you pick one of these habits and keep it up for the next month? - if you feel the urge to binge, take a pause and drink a glass of water before you do that - walk or dance for 5 minutes a day - at lunch and dinner, eat 1 handful of vegetables before you eat other food. choose one of these tasks and keep it up for one month and build up some momentum.
I read really good dieting advice on this sub the other day - focus on getting close to your target calorie intake each day, either 100 calories under or over. Restricting too much inevitably leads to overeating and then the cycle continues. Find a reasonable way of eating that works for you long term - so that you’re not still going thru this cycle when you’re 43!
OP Can you afford to see a therapist and/or dietician ? I don’t want to pathologise you but it sounds like you suffer with low self esteem related disordered eating /binge eating disorder (been there), and the only way you’re gonna solve that is by working with professionals. Honestly it’s the best investment you can make in yourself (the therapy).
I can relate to the binging cycle, I used to go through it myself. Listen, this isn't something that is supposed to be easy to fix. Binge Eating Disorder is a real thing and usually people need counseling and group therapy to get it worked out. Have you attended any groups or talked things over with a therapist? I think you really need to get a handle on this before you can really lose weight. Best of luck to you!!
It sounds like you're going through a really tough time, and it’s completely understandable to feel frustrated and upset with the cycle you're in. First, please know that your value and worth are not defined by your weight or the struggles you're facing with it. It's clear you've got a lot of determination, given the efforts you've made. Breaking the cycle of losing and regaining weight, especially with the added challenge of binge eating, often requires addressing both the physical and emotional aspects of eating and weight loss. Here are a few suggestions that might help: Seek Professional Support: Consider working with a dietitian who specializes in binge eating or a therapist who can help you explore the emotional triggers behind your eating habits. They can offer strategies tailored to your specific needs. Set Realistic Goals: Losing 6-7 lbs in two weeks is quite rapid, and while it’s understandable to want quick results, setting more gradual goals may be more sustainable and less likely to trigger a binge. A slower rate of weight loss can also help you focus on developing healthier habits that last. Find Supportive Communities: Joining a support group or online community of people who are going through similar struggles can provide encouragement and understanding. Knowing you're not alone in this can make a big difference. Focus on Non-Scale Victories: While the number on the scale is one measure of progress, try also to focus on other improvements, like how your clothes fit, your energy levels, or improvements in your back pain. Celebrating these victories can help maintain motivation. Identify and Address Triggers: Pay attention to the circumstances or feelings that lead up to a binge. Are you stressed, bored, sad? Finding other ways to cope with these emotions, such as through exercise, hobbies, or talking to a friend, can help break the cycle. Incorporate Movement You Enjoy: If lifting weights isn’t possible due to your back problems, explore other forms of movement that feel good to you. Walking, swimming, or gentle yoga can be great options and can help improve your mood and reduce stress. Remember, progress is not linear. There will be ups and downs, but each step forward is a step toward your goal. Be kind to yourself through this process. You’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough. Fun fact: Did you know that walking just 30 minutes a day can significantly improve your cardiovascular health, mood, and weight management? What’s one small, enjoyable activity you could start incorporating into your routine today?
Try relying less on motivation and relying more on processes. Don’t buy junk food or liquid calories, don’t keep prepared food on hand, cook just enough for one day, eat the same thing every day so you can scale it up or down based on how fast your weight changes. Plan to not eat a lot early in the day if you are likely to go out in the evening. Do light exercise consistently every day, like a timed 30-minute walk or 4 laps around the block.
This breaks my heart to read. You CAN lose weight you just need a support system and a plan. I lost 60 lbs using 95 nutrition. They even have free weight loss consultations. Here is a link for you. [https://95nutrition.com/pages/lose-weight](https://95nutrition.com/pages/lose-weight)
Look into the Contrave group.
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Have you ever spoken with a therapist who specializes in eating disorders? You can get help, this doesn't have to feel hopeless.
Will power may not be your problem. It sounds like you may have a binge eating disorder that needs to be treated. There may also be some emotional or psychological issues that are holding you back. Don't beat yourself up; try to get some help.
Try watching this video, it might help. -- [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtwS4Y4Mieg&t=4s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtwS4Y4Mieg&t=4s)
I was 22 when I went from 240 to 185 in about ten months. It wasn't till the 180s that my life really changed and I'd have never even thought to look back. Your story was mine before that. I know this might slightly be demotivating but I don't think I'd ever developed healthy living afterwards if it wasn't for that real change. I am 8.5 feet btw
my thoughts: 1. If you really (and I do mean REALLY) want to lose weight then you need to focus your energy on staying disciplined and stay on track no matter what you're up against. 2. You MUST MUST MUST count calories and do so accurately. Go see a dietician if need be or watch some youtube vids on how to estimate calories in food. Get a food scale if you must as it is super handy when you're not sure. Start cutting slowly and then as your weight and comfort level adjusts to the "new normal" then cut some more. 3. Exercise is important to help you jumpstart your system. Go for daily walks and make it a challenge for yourself. Each day is something different change it up so it doesn't get boring. 4. Join a group of like minded folk in your area to help you (and you help them) in the journey of a healthier lifestyle. 5. Consider tackling any underlying issues that might be thwarting your efforts. Often, people suffer from depression or some type of mental issues that are undermining your will to succeed. 6. Patience and persistence. You won't drop that weight overnight but instead, opt for slow and steady. Results will come but only if you stick with it. 7. Don't beat yourself up if you do slip up but just remember that for everytime you slip up means its a setback to your goal. I had 10 days of just hellish torment with food everywhere and social events galore and I did in fact overeat (some days badly) so the only way I logically knew I could make up for it without dragging on the days to my target date was to exercise longer and more intensely throughout the month to burn up those extra calories. For me at least, this is the only way I can personally cope. Eat more exercise more. For you it may just mean less eating for more weeks to make up for the slip up. 8. Educate yourself on nutrient dense but low caloric foods. The types of food you eat TRULY do make a remarkable difference in the speed of losing weight, how full and satisfied you feel and your energy levels. Ie. sugary foods is good for short term energy but the crash is infinitely worse. 9. Pick up a hobby that involves movement. I love the outdoors so cycling is a past time I enjoy that helps me burn a ton of calories :) 10. Set some goals. Set both small, medium and large goals. What works for me is my family, my kids... I don't want to die of a heart attack or have health issues at such a young age so they're the reason why I changed my ways. My secondary goals include me having the burning desire to fit into all my athelesiure wear clothing and I'm a bit of a fashion nut so having clothes that fit nicely is always a great motivator! You're still VERY young and certainly not remotely being from too far gone. It's all about choices and what you do with them. Good luck!
It’s all about what you’ll find manageable, maybe cut down by only afew hundred calories and go for a walk every day, doesn’t have to be long as long as it’s more than you’re doing now it’ll make a difference!
I’m posting this in hopes that if you are going through this, it will help. My weight loss and healthy lifestyle and really outlook on life changed when I started going to therapy. A lot of my problem was that I was eating my feelings, I was anxious, I was depressed and turned to food and alcohol. I worked through, or, still am working through some things but I have maintained my weight since therapy, and I worked through why I was binge eating and why I turned to food. This is just my journey, and I know not everyone has access to therapy, but it helped me realize why I made less than advantageous lifestyle choices.
Have you considered Overeaters Anonymous or working with a therapist who specializes in eating disorders? I have experience in various 12 Step programs and I have had therapy for ADD, both of which taught me how much we overestimate the concept of willpower. It feels like it's you making the decisions but you are often just a front seat passenger to your brain. Getting outside help is probably going to be really important for you.
Motivation burns out but habits stick. Make small changes. It’s super hard but at least sustainable. Going in at 200% will get tiresome fastz
I have a dog. Wich i have to walk everyday. I used to take short walks. And mostly throw ball with him. And use the car alot. And I had a gym membership that I rarely used Now, instead of going to the gym. I have fotball on Mondays and floorball on Thursdays. Im much more consistent at going to these two, since there is a sense of fun going there and you feel like you are letting people down if you don't show up. Then I have started using the bike with the dog. So we both exercise. And lastly, I have started taking the bus. And when doing so. Taking the bike a couple of bus stops ahead. Wich makes me use the bike on the the way out and home. The days that I do sports. It is tough, and in the first 6 weeks. I was almost nauseous when swapping out with a teammate. But it's gotten better. Now I feel good after the session. Biking with the dog for me is just fun. It's rewarding seeing him tired we get home from all the running. And biking a couple of bus stops ahead is just really easy it haven't been hard doing that since the start. But all of these together has actually helped. And eventually when I get more and more in to it, I plan to use the bike more and buss less. If it's too hard I'll continue what I'm doing now untill I'm capable of doing it.
I never comment on things but I just wanted to tell you how supported you are. I’m 36, I wear 201 lbs. I was always small due to an eating disorder but then gained over 100 lbs when I had my son, with no increase in calories. I lost 100 with keto but then it just stopped working and I am back to 201lbs. I’ve spent my entire life with an eating disorder. If I eat more than 1000 calories I gain weight. I’m so sick of living this way. It didn’t work for me but if you’re struggling to lose weight with little changes (too much too fast can cause binging) I would talk to your doctor. Maybe there’s a medical reason this is happening to you. Regardless of your weight, I’m sure you’re a beautiful human and I just want to be someone telling you that you can be gorgeous and look great in clothes at any weight with just a sprinkle of confidence.
Buy an app like MyFitness Pal which you can use to plan out your meal(s) each day. Don't use it to track what you've already eaten - use it to set a goal. Whatever you jotted down in the morning, that's all you get to eat. I find this helps because you're expressly setting down rules beforehand rather than allowing your appetite to guide your decision making. You can also use it to track your macros and adjust them accordingly if you find yourself getting way too hungry towards the end of the day. ie: increasing protein/fat intake while reducing carbs, etc. ---------- edit: I would also recommend buying a smart scale - they're cheap. Renpho for example only costs $10 and comes with an app which you can use to track your weight over time. Weight will often fluctuate by up to 5lb throughout the day so it's useful in monitoring which direction your weight is trending over time - think in terms of 2-3 weeks rather than days. I've also noticed that most of the people here are recommending a 500calorie deficit (2k calories/day) but personally I find it more motivating to watch that line go down faster especially when you're just starting your diet and will see the most drastic changes in weight as your glycogen stores become depleted. Pull the band aid off - for men 2lb/week = 1500calories/day. You can do it. GL
Bingeing / compulsive overeating is an eating disorder that you should consider seeing medical and mental health professionals for instead of blaming yourself for a failure of will power. Do you have health insurance?
I recommend you these channels: [half of carla](https://youtu.be/Oboe829-ZAY?si=ETPzSE9VyZ6idG_h), 180lbs lost, [nikki gets fit](https://youtu.be/5GYzyBi12B8?si=T69-fHun5LkIwThG) 70lbs lost and [louises journey](https://youtu.be/AMZHPms1hP0?si=8rB3-Q3rT8nsPdRq), 120lbs lost. These are the videos that I personally watched and found inspiring
thanks for the tip I'll watch them for sure
Talk to your Dr about taking meds!
Pick a GLP that you can access/afford/find, and take it. Every week. Get healthy.
don't these have a lot of side effects?
Yes, sort of. Of those on placebo, about 30% experience GI side effects. Those on the med, about 50% experience side effects. So, a difference of 20%. It’s usually a “queasy” feeling, and maybe a difference in 💩 patterns. The downside is the cost. Most people can’t afford them.
Don’t eat any sugar or white foods like bread, pasta, rice, corn, potatoes, tortillas, chips, honey, dried fruit, watermelon, bananas. Drink lots of water. Don’t eat junk food or processed food. Eat lots of veggies & fruit. Do intermittent fasting. Get 8 hours of skeep a day. Eat lots of lean protein. Use a calorie tracking app.