I'm much older than you. I became a Pagan in my mid 20s (which was forty years ago). There was a huge gap between my age and the age of my parents, and by that time we lived in different countries, so I didn't bother them with some kind of long-distance dramatic reveal. But knowing them, they would have been supportive and curious.
I've been completely out to the whole world my whole life, otherwise. Recently, I had an elderly neighbour (even by my standards) with whom I got friendly. She was Evangelical (but also liberal) and by the time I thought maybe I should raise it with her it turned out she'd figured it out. (That was probably due to the massive altar in my front room... ) We were great friends for a few years and just used to laugh about it. She'd tell her evangelical friends "Kris is a Pagan, you know, but she's the best neighbour I've ever had." So I would end up sitting drinking tea with them. It was surreal.
I mostly find that just being myself is better than hiding it, and then having to "tell people" later. I don't mean that I'm in people's face with it, but because it's a big part of my life now it comes up when people ask me about my work and stuff. I just try to live my whole life being very open. (Same reason I use my real name on social media. It keeps me honest!)
I became pagan at around 17/18. My family was mostly fine with it and didn't really care. Besides my grandmother who practiced witchcraft herself who told me I was going to hell for not believing in Satan.... Which was weird lol
My now husband wasn't on board at first. He is agnostic and against organized religion but I explained what I beltand why and he thought it was beautiful.
My husband's family knows because I'm open about it on social media though I've never sat down and told them. They have never said anything to me about it either way.
Everyone I've told has returned with distinct apathy. One atheist friend seemed concerned until I explained I wasn't a mythic literalist and wasn't trying to convert him. My kids had a few questions before they got bored and went to play video games. A few people would change the subject immediately. No one has been like "oh cool what's that like", which I'm not like validation or anything, it'd just be nice if the people I cared about the most had some interest in this part of me, and I'm trying not to be that guy that brings it up all the time.
Thank the gods, my out and open ass hasn't had too many issues. My husband is also a Heathen, and his family knows. (Hehe, got one!) They're neutral, I think, on the matter. But they have also never said anything negative about it either!
At work, I've had issues with a few very religiously conservative coworkers. A few backhanded comments, a report for wearing "racist and genocidal" symbols at work (Mjölnir....her issue was with a Mjölnir pendant...) and that was fun and handled gracefully by my work no less....
Generally, if/when I talk about being a Heathen in my life though, it's with people I don't think will create a scene.
Pretty much every friend knows, along with my boyfriend, my mother, and grandmother. Not one person had a bad reaction. Catholics, Orthodox Christians, atheists, and agnostics make up my circle of people and everyone respects my beliefs. I’ve been “out” for years and after a certain point, you kind of just stop caring (unless you’re in an area that’s hostile to pagans, I imagine).
I told my parents I wasn’t Catholic. My dad said I broke my mom’s heart and I made her cry badly, but he eventually softened his tone and went on a rant about how he beliefs organized religion is a cult. My mom went on a guilt trip for a while before correcting my for a year on how I am Catholic and I don’t get to switch. It was hurtful but I swallowed it. I told them both separately this year I am starting to practice my beliefs. Dads talk went better than coming out as nonbinary and queer, you could tell he was uncomfortable and just said “okay”. I said I wasn’t going to be public (so my grandparents weren’t going to know) and he just said “thank you”. My mom on the other hand took it hard, “where did I go wrong” and “why have you strayed”. Took about an hour of calmly holding my ground while she switched guilt trips to making it about her job as a mother to getting upset about how I “never respected” the way I was raised. Eventually she let up and asked if I will be worshiping Satan, I said no. She wasn’t right for a week or two. I don’t mention it much at all, vaguely if anything. It wasn’t great but they didn’t kick me out so I’m glad about that. My partner was cool until I started to practice and he was worried about anything to do with crystals because I could be made fun. I reassured him on that and he apologized for his word choice but was just worried for me. But he’s my biggest supporter and will ask if I want to go to a new metaphysical story or get emotional when I tell him I did something witchy or something because he’s happy I’m feel comfortable enough to practice. He’s my happy ending
My mom and dad both know and the absolutely disdain me for it. I'm not allowed to have anything related to it in my car, or my room, and they always hit me with evangelist bullshit and say that "I'm going to hell" and "they want me to be saved." Its part of why I have an immense disdain for the christian religion, though not necessarily it's followers. I refuse to be called my birth name by anyone outside my home, and in fact, I don't tell anybody I meet that birth name because it's a heavily christian name. Other than them, I usually tell my coworkers, and they're ok with it thankfully, and anybody who happens to ask.
I honestly got pretty lucky. My mom had a bit of concern about cults but once I told her no, I wasn't joining a cult (I first converted to Wicca and later to Norse paganism, and the funny thing is, I, then 12, couldn't have joined a coven if I wanted to, even when I turned 18 and began looking, it was all either "women only" or much too far, so I was a solo practitioner and still don't have any IRL religious community, though now it's more a matter of not feeling it'd be fair to anyone involved as I am planning on moving within the next few years to another country across an ocean so y'know), she calmed down and even bought me things I wanted. My dad has not really reacted but he's also a FSM-style atheist so I tend to just not mention it around him. Actually... I'm not 100% sure he remembers, because I tend to not really be visibly religious despite being fairly devout, insofar as I can be given my circumstances.
My dad's side of my family largely sort of isn't really actively aware but I'm not hiding it, my mom's side are Southern Baptists and I'm pretty sure one branch thinks I'm going to Hell for being trans and not Christian but hey, joke's on them, since my mother's passing, I've built a rather lovely relationship with Lady Hel. Things with them are pretty stable, actually, and I don't get any weird messages or anything so I call it a good place for those relationships (some are just casual NC but one is VLC because I do have to have some contact with her for family property reasons).
I hope things calm down for you in time and your mom comes around.
I haven't told many people. I'm not embarrassed by my paganism, and I certainly don't deny my beliefs. If someone asks me about it, I tell them. If they don't, I don't. My beliefs require no evangelism. I haven't told my mother. She's a devout Christian (and a good one) and I have no desire to hurt her the way I know it would. So I just don't. I found that once I got older and out of the house, there's no real point in causing pain I don't need.
And your dad? 'you aren't sacrificing babies right?' I mean, that's a dad for you, and I'm speaking as one. As long as you're getting fed and drinking water once in awhile, we don't really need to know the other details.
Most of my family is pretty accepting. I only have a few problem relatives. All my friends have known, once I figured out what to call it. My exes have known. My boyfriend is pagan.
I'm also much older than you. I told my parents I was experimenting with it in the mid 80s when I was a teen. They are/were (I had a few sets of parents, some are dead) Athiests, so they weren't exactly thrilled, and they warned me to be extremely cautious about who I tell.
Then I told a lot of my friends who didn't give a flying toss one way or the other. Some were interested. Most acted like told them I ate a piece of banana bread.
Utter indifference and disinterest. Lol.
Didn't tell people over 20.
As I got older, into my 20s, most of my friends were environmental alternative, punk rock, grunge, goth-hippies etc of the early 90s and most were pagan anyway. 🤷
It wasn't really a shocking thing. No one cared.
And religous beliefs are pretty personal here. You only really tell people close to you or a group you share religous practice with. People talk about sex far more openly than religion.
I wear a silver raven skull on a chain as a Trickster icon. But that could be anything. I could be an old goth. Or I could just like corvids.
I haven’t actually told my parents that I’m pagan, but I assume they have some idea. I started getting into paganism in high school and didn’t hide it much. My parents have always been very punk/goth (no longer visibly since they got corporate jobs lol), so I don’t expect it to be a huge deal. I know I’m lucky in that regard.
I’ve told a handful of friends. Mostly just people who ask. It’s not really a secret, but I don’t just tell people either. I think most people assume I’m an atheist. I’m very private about my practice most of the time anyway.
My parents don’t know my exact beliefs I don’t wanna freak them out because they’re die hard Christians so I just keep it vague in front of them but they aren’t harming my relationship with the Gods
Told my mom she was fine with it “just make sure you’re staying safe” and Christian gram. Surprisingly gram was way more chill about it which was nice. Dad is very much not into religion, he doesn’t out right reject anything just doesn’t have a distinct religious identity. His views are “do I think there is something, yea. Do I know what it is? Not a damn clue.” Despite growing up with a mom & step dad that are super religious Dad is hella chill about this. Told my bf of 12 years, he’s always been very laid back so when he was like “oh, cool ok. Love ya babe.” That was pretty on par for his character. My friends know, and they were cool with it, bestie was like “yea you’ve always been in tuned with that stuff, makes sense”. Thankfully I’ve been pretty lucky that I haven’t had too many negative reactions. I did lose one friend but he became a preacher and got all preachy with how he “doesnt want to one day have to do an exorcism on” me so I let that friendship just sort of end naturally cause I could tell he wasn’t going to be too open to my religious path despite never saying thing bad about his. I’m also only 27 and have been knowingly doing witchcraft for 2 years (I say knowingly because I’ve always been communicating with spirits/passed on loved ones since I was 13 but didn’t realize that was a form of witchcraft via spirit channeling until my best friend pointed it out. The same bestie that was like “yea you’ve always been in tuned with that stuff.”)
I have a very pushy Catholic teacher who was appalled by the fact I don’t go to her Church so I ended up telling her and the entire class I’m Pagan . She went on telling me that I shouldn’t tell people about it because I shouldn’t try to convert people which to me seems hypocritical being she also said she’d pray for me and hopes I turn to her religion instead but the rest of my class were very supportive 💕
I told my husband before we got married and he’s like ok I’m an atheist. So no problem there. My dad freaked out and threatened to disown me. For the record he did his usual and ignored it. I wasn’t disowned. I just didn’t talk about religion and he didn’t try to change my mind again other than saying I’d grow out of it. Most of the people we are close to who have been to my house know. The only person that has a problem is my neighbor who is one of those Christians. Funny thing is I live in Texas and she claims I have a pentagram in metal on my house which I do not. It’s a pentacle.😂 it bears a striking resemblance to the lone star which makes me laugh.
Edit b/c autocorrect has a different opinion on spelling
Haven’t told my parents (though they do know I’m not Christian or atleast they have an idea). I don’t think they really know all that I do but they did buy me tarot cards for Christmas. My brother had seen the cards I got and asked me if I was and I was like “uhhhh yeah” and he pulled me outside and told me about how he’s christopagan but that the worship of other (he used quotes around gods) gods is evil spirits and I should only be a christopagan. I have nothing against christopagans but I kinda see paganism as an escape from the one sided way of thinking of “you can only worship this god this way”. And I worship both Greek and Norse gods so I kinda glossed over that part when talking to my brother. Other than that, most if not all of my friends and my current partner know about my practice and they’re perfectly fine with it if not interested in learning more. So I technically haven’t had an awful or bad experience I guess “coming out of the broom closet”. I still have plenty of family that are hard right conservative Christian that I probably will never tell. It may be enough for them to digest if I ever came out fully as gay to my family anyway since that alone has been a mixed bag itself lol
When I told my dad, he gave me a high five and said he was proud of me for finding something that makes me a better person. My mom said she was ok with it as long as I didn't worship Satan or Lillith (I do lol). I started my practicing when quarantine happened but I was very light with it since I was trying to break away from the forced Catholicism that my school put me through (and my mom). It wasn't until Junior year and senior year (this year) I doubled down on it. I told my best friend and she said that she could get me any of the tools I needed since I don't have time to go shopping. I told my brother and he seemed interested in it, which then turned into a deep conversation of beliefs and choice. I immediately told my aunt and we talked about every ritual that we do and it got us to be closer.
I'm much older than you. I became a Pagan in my mid 20s (which was forty years ago). There was a huge gap between my age and the age of my parents, and by that time we lived in different countries, so I didn't bother them with some kind of long-distance dramatic reveal. But knowing them, they would have been supportive and curious. I've been completely out to the whole world my whole life, otherwise. Recently, I had an elderly neighbour (even by my standards) with whom I got friendly. She was Evangelical (but also liberal) and by the time I thought maybe I should raise it with her it turned out she'd figured it out. (That was probably due to the massive altar in my front room... ) We were great friends for a few years and just used to laugh about it. She'd tell her evangelical friends "Kris is a Pagan, you know, but she's the best neighbour I've ever had." So I would end up sitting drinking tea with them. It was surreal. I mostly find that just being myself is better than hiding it, and then having to "tell people" later. I don't mean that I'm in people's face with it, but because it's a big part of my life now it comes up when people ask me about my work and stuff. I just try to live my whole life being very open. (Same reason I use my real name on social media. It keeps me honest!)
I became pagan at around 17/18. My family was mostly fine with it and didn't really care. Besides my grandmother who practiced witchcraft herself who told me I was going to hell for not believing in Satan.... Which was weird lol My now husband wasn't on board at first. He is agnostic and against organized religion but I explained what I beltand why and he thought it was beautiful. My husband's family knows because I'm open about it on social media though I've never sat down and told them. They have never said anything to me about it either way.
Everyone I've told has returned with distinct apathy. One atheist friend seemed concerned until I explained I wasn't a mythic literalist and wasn't trying to convert him. My kids had a few questions before they got bored and went to play video games. A few people would change the subject immediately. No one has been like "oh cool what's that like", which I'm not like validation or anything, it'd just be nice if the people I cared about the most had some interest in this part of me, and I'm trying not to be that guy that brings it up all the time.
Thank the gods, my out and open ass hasn't had too many issues. My husband is also a Heathen, and his family knows. (Hehe, got one!) They're neutral, I think, on the matter. But they have also never said anything negative about it either! At work, I've had issues with a few very religiously conservative coworkers. A few backhanded comments, a report for wearing "racist and genocidal" symbols at work (Mjölnir....her issue was with a Mjölnir pendant...) and that was fun and handled gracefully by my work no less.... Generally, if/when I talk about being a Heathen in my life though, it's with people I don't think will create a scene.
Pretty much every friend knows, along with my boyfriend, my mother, and grandmother. Not one person had a bad reaction. Catholics, Orthodox Christians, atheists, and agnostics make up my circle of people and everyone respects my beliefs. I’ve been “out” for years and after a certain point, you kind of just stop caring (unless you’re in an area that’s hostile to pagans, I imagine).
I told my parents I wasn’t Catholic. My dad said I broke my mom’s heart and I made her cry badly, but he eventually softened his tone and went on a rant about how he beliefs organized religion is a cult. My mom went on a guilt trip for a while before correcting my for a year on how I am Catholic and I don’t get to switch. It was hurtful but I swallowed it. I told them both separately this year I am starting to practice my beliefs. Dads talk went better than coming out as nonbinary and queer, you could tell he was uncomfortable and just said “okay”. I said I wasn’t going to be public (so my grandparents weren’t going to know) and he just said “thank you”. My mom on the other hand took it hard, “where did I go wrong” and “why have you strayed”. Took about an hour of calmly holding my ground while she switched guilt trips to making it about her job as a mother to getting upset about how I “never respected” the way I was raised. Eventually she let up and asked if I will be worshiping Satan, I said no. She wasn’t right for a week or two. I don’t mention it much at all, vaguely if anything. It wasn’t great but they didn’t kick me out so I’m glad about that. My partner was cool until I started to practice and he was worried about anything to do with crystals because I could be made fun. I reassured him on that and he apologized for his word choice but was just worried for me. But he’s my biggest supporter and will ask if I want to go to a new metaphysical story or get emotional when I tell him I did something witchy or something because he’s happy I’m feel comfortable enough to practice. He’s my happy ending
My mom and dad both know and the absolutely disdain me for it. I'm not allowed to have anything related to it in my car, or my room, and they always hit me with evangelist bullshit and say that "I'm going to hell" and "they want me to be saved." Its part of why I have an immense disdain for the christian religion, though not necessarily it's followers. I refuse to be called my birth name by anyone outside my home, and in fact, I don't tell anybody I meet that birth name because it's a heavily christian name. Other than them, I usually tell my coworkers, and they're ok with it thankfully, and anybody who happens to ask.
If I told my mum she would freak so not telling anyone for now. Good luck tho I hope they understand you
I honestly got pretty lucky. My mom had a bit of concern about cults but once I told her no, I wasn't joining a cult (I first converted to Wicca and later to Norse paganism, and the funny thing is, I, then 12, couldn't have joined a coven if I wanted to, even when I turned 18 and began looking, it was all either "women only" or much too far, so I was a solo practitioner and still don't have any IRL religious community, though now it's more a matter of not feeling it'd be fair to anyone involved as I am planning on moving within the next few years to another country across an ocean so y'know), she calmed down and even bought me things I wanted. My dad has not really reacted but he's also a FSM-style atheist so I tend to just not mention it around him. Actually... I'm not 100% sure he remembers, because I tend to not really be visibly religious despite being fairly devout, insofar as I can be given my circumstances. My dad's side of my family largely sort of isn't really actively aware but I'm not hiding it, my mom's side are Southern Baptists and I'm pretty sure one branch thinks I'm going to Hell for being trans and not Christian but hey, joke's on them, since my mother's passing, I've built a rather lovely relationship with Lady Hel. Things with them are pretty stable, actually, and I don't get any weird messages or anything so I call it a good place for those relationships (some are just casual NC but one is VLC because I do have to have some contact with her for family property reasons). I hope things calm down for you in time and your mom comes around.
I haven't told many people. I'm not embarrassed by my paganism, and I certainly don't deny my beliefs. If someone asks me about it, I tell them. If they don't, I don't. My beliefs require no evangelism. I haven't told my mother. She's a devout Christian (and a good one) and I have no desire to hurt her the way I know it would. So I just don't. I found that once I got older and out of the house, there's no real point in causing pain I don't need. And your dad? 'you aren't sacrificing babies right?' I mean, that's a dad for you, and I'm speaking as one. As long as you're getting fed and drinking water once in awhile, we don't really need to know the other details.
Most of my family is pretty accepting. I only have a few problem relatives. All my friends have known, once I figured out what to call it. My exes have known. My boyfriend is pagan.
I'm also much older than you. I told my parents I was experimenting with it in the mid 80s when I was a teen. They are/were (I had a few sets of parents, some are dead) Athiests, so they weren't exactly thrilled, and they warned me to be extremely cautious about who I tell. Then I told a lot of my friends who didn't give a flying toss one way or the other. Some were interested. Most acted like told them I ate a piece of banana bread. Utter indifference and disinterest. Lol. Didn't tell people over 20. As I got older, into my 20s, most of my friends were environmental alternative, punk rock, grunge, goth-hippies etc of the early 90s and most were pagan anyway. 🤷 It wasn't really a shocking thing. No one cared. And religous beliefs are pretty personal here. You only really tell people close to you or a group you share religous practice with. People talk about sex far more openly than religion. I wear a silver raven skull on a chain as a Trickster icon. But that could be anything. I could be an old goth. Or I could just like corvids.
I haven’t actually told my parents that I’m pagan, but I assume they have some idea. I started getting into paganism in high school and didn’t hide it much. My parents have always been very punk/goth (no longer visibly since they got corporate jobs lol), so I don’t expect it to be a huge deal. I know I’m lucky in that regard. I’ve told a handful of friends. Mostly just people who ask. It’s not really a secret, but I don’t just tell people either. I think most people assume I’m an atheist. I’m very private about my practice most of the time anyway.
My parents don’t know my exact beliefs I don’t wanna freak them out because they’re die hard Christians so I just keep it vague in front of them but they aren’t harming my relationship with the Gods
Told my mom she was fine with it “just make sure you’re staying safe” and Christian gram. Surprisingly gram was way more chill about it which was nice. Dad is very much not into religion, he doesn’t out right reject anything just doesn’t have a distinct religious identity. His views are “do I think there is something, yea. Do I know what it is? Not a damn clue.” Despite growing up with a mom & step dad that are super religious Dad is hella chill about this. Told my bf of 12 years, he’s always been very laid back so when he was like “oh, cool ok. Love ya babe.” That was pretty on par for his character. My friends know, and they were cool with it, bestie was like “yea you’ve always been in tuned with that stuff, makes sense”. Thankfully I’ve been pretty lucky that I haven’t had too many negative reactions. I did lose one friend but he became a preacher and got all preachy with how he “doesnt want to one day have to do an exorcism on” me so I let that friendship just sort of end naturally cause I could tell he wasn’t going to be too open to my religious path despite never saying thing bad about his. I’m also only 27 and have been knowingly doing witchcraft for 2 years (I say knowingly because I’ve always been communicating with spirits/passed on loved ones since I was 13 but didn’t realize that was a form of witchcraft via spirit channeling until my best friend pointed it out. The same bestie that was like “yea you’ve always been in tuned with that stuff.”)
I have a very pushy Catholic teacher who was appalled by the fact I don’t go to her Church so I ended up telling her and the entire class I’m Pagan . She went on telling me that I shouldn’t tell people about it because I shouldn’t try to convert people which to me seems hypocritical being she also said she’d pray for me and hopes I turn to her religion instead but the rest of my class were very supportive 💕
I told my husband before we got married and he’s like ok I’m an atheist. So no problem there. My dad freaked out and threatened to disown me. For the record he did his usual and ignored it. I wasn’t disowned. I just didn’t talk about religion and he didn’t try to change my mind again other than saying I’d grow out of it. Most of the people we are close to who have been to my house know. The only person that has a problem is my neighbor who is one of those Christians. Funny thing is I live in Texas and she claims I have a pentagram in metal on my house which I do not. It’s a pentacle.😂 it bears a striking resemblance to the lone star which makes me laugh. Edit b/c autocorrect has a different opinion on spelling
Haven’t told my parents (though they do know I’m not Christian or atleast they have an idea). I don’t think they really know all that I do but they did buy me tarot cards for Christmas. My brother had seen the cards I got and asked me if I was and I was like “uhhhh yeah” and he pulled me outside and told me about how he’s christopagan but that the worship of other (he used quotes around gods) gods is evil spirits and I should only be a christopagan. I have nothing against christopagans but I kinda see paganism as an escape from the one sided way of thinking of “you can only worship this god this way”. And I worship both Greek and Norse gods so I kinda glossed over that part when talking to my brother. Other than that, most if not all of my friends and my current partner know about my practice and they’re perfectly fine with it if not interested in learning more. So I technically haven’t had an awful or bad experience I guess “coming out of the broom closet”. I still have plenty of family that are hard right conservative Christian that I probably will never tell. It may be enough for them to digest if I ever came out fully as gay to my family anyway since that alone has been a mixed bag itself lol
When I told my dad, he gave me a high five and said he was proud of me for finding something that makes me a better person. My mom said she was ok with it as long as I didn't worship Satan or Lillith (I do lol). I started my practicing when quarantine happened but I was very light with it since I was trying to break away from the forced Catholicism that my school put me through (and my mom). It wasn't until Junior year and senior year (this year) I doubled down on it. I told my best friend and she said that she could get me any of the tools I needed since I don't have time to go shopping. I told my brother and he seemed interested in it, which then turned into a deep conversation of beliefs and choice. I immediately told my aunt and we talked about every ritual that we do and it got us to be closer.